Feeling really low and confused

Discussion in 'First Trimester' started by Dovekie, Oct 1, 2016.

  1. Dovekie

    Dovekie Well-Known Member

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    I'm 5w+5d. The pregnancy was an accident, with a guy I've been with for 4 months. I wasn't 100% about the relationship, but I was going with the flow as it was early days and there was time to see what developed.

    Now this, and plans for us to move in together, asap. Except that I just feel depressed and uncertain. I don't know if I want to live with him, or even be with him.

    What I want to know is, is it just the hormones making me feel this way? Or do I need to seriously reconsider what I'm going to do? Is it possible to continue with the relationship slowly? Is it ok for me to have the baby without him? He thinks I shouldn't have it if I'm not with him.

    I suffered with PMDD before this, which affected the relationship.
     
  2. snowbee

    snowbee Well-Known Member

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    This must be a really confusing time for you. It is very much ok to have your baby without him, or without being more committed to him. I think you know you don't want to jump deeper into your relationship, there is nothing at all wrong with wanting to carry on slowly and see how things progress. Maybe he feels he should step up and offer more commitment if there is to be a baby? He may feel he is offering to do the right thing. I think you would benefit from talking with someone impartial, and then when you are clearer in your mind what you would like to do have a talk with him.

    Good luck and I hope everything works out how you would like it to.
     
  3. Pambi

    Pambi Well-Known Member

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    That's quite controlling behaviour to say you shouldn't have it if you are not with him. That's not how it works and I'm not surprised you are having second thoughts on moving in with him.

    I think you need to let him know how you are feeling about moving in and organise some time to delay it. Having a baby shouldn't be the reason to move in together, it should be because you both want your relationship to move to the next level. It sounds to me like you are not ready. I know its hard with hormones to deal with it emotionally, but you know yourself and your own mind.
     

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