Feeling fed up

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Chat' started by Kimmyj_b, Jul 9, 2013.

  1. Kimmyj_b

    Kimmyj_b Well-Known Member

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    Went for my 20 week scan yesterday and everything was well from what they could see. They confirmed that he was a she which is good. However, they couldn't do some of the checking as baby was being awkward. They sent me out for a walk around and that didn't help so I've got to go back next week.

    I read my notes post scan and it said 'view severely obstructed by maternal habitus' which upon googling, I have discovered is because I'm fat.

    Now I KNOW that I'm fat..... I'm annoyed because she couldn't see the baby because the baby was facing forward and hiding her head. Why does it have to come back to my weight?

    Throughout my pregnancy, my weight has been made an issue. I have to go to a special health and well being clinic to be told not to eat cake and chips (that's all fat people eat apparently).

    They also keep trying to make me go to an over 30s group for people with a BMI of 30+. WTF! They teach you how to 'pamper yourself'?!!

    I feel like I'm being looked down on because of my weight and I'm not going to experience the same things as other slim mums to be because I'm overweight. I was awake for hours last night thinking about it.

    Anyway rant over. Better get my moany fat arse to work :(
     
  2. hayes

    hayes Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to hear this hun,

    Think its disgraceful to write that and make you feel bad. My mw said that im on the boarder for being underweight(which i know and cant help its not my fault)but she was lovely about it and said she wudnt refer me yet as she knows its the bloody sickness. Try not to let it get to you hun.

    Michelle. x
     
  3. CountryGirl

    CountryGirl Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to hear that luv. I'm only 7+4 weeks and I'm already overweight as I always have been. I'm kind of expecting it to be a big deal during my pregnancy so am not looking forward to it. It's so stupid though because you can't go on a diet when you're pregnant and when you're feel naff you wanna eat stuff that makes you feel good.

    I can't exercise because I get out of breath after about 3 minutes. So it's pointless.

    I know lots of "bigger" women (as I refer to myself) who have had fine pregnancies and births, so don't worry too much.

    I know it's hard, I feel like a beached whale already and that isn't because of a bump because I don't have one yet!

    Try and be positive about yourself, love who you are and how you look because we are all different. The baby is healthy and fine so you're not doing anything wrong.

    Keep your chin up. We're always here for a rant (I was feeling the exact same as you the other day). I still don't look forward to my first MW appointment because I know she's going to tell me I'm overweight.

    Hugs xx
     
  4. brand new

    brand new Well-Known Member

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    Babe please don't let it get u down. I am over weight too and I also had this written on my notes. I too was upset and then I thought f**k u!! I managed to create this miracle of life, and just because I'm fat it doesn't mean I can't carry this baby as well as any one else, and I can be just as good as a mum as a skinny person!! In my whole pregnancy I only put on 6lb! So that showed the consultants that I didn't eat my body weight in crap! I do eat sensibly and I am a actual grown up and can make good decisions!! Please don't let it get u down my lovely. U will be a fantastic mummy and please don't take any notice if anyone else , big hugs my lovely xx
     
  5. Toria111

    Toria111 Well-Known Member

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    Don't let it get you down. I think they tell everyone over a size 10 that they are over weight. I was a size 14 when I fell pregnant with my first and was told I needed to watch my weight. I proceeded to lose a lot of weight from severe morning sickness. Then half way through my pregnancy they started telling me I need to eat more cause I was losing too much weight. Either way I felt like I was constantly getting told off. Size 10 and 40lbs lighter the day I left hospital after having my son.
     
  6. Kayley91

    Kayley91 Well-Known Member

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    I'm in exactly the same position hun!! it sucks!! :(

    I was told there was no point having a 4d scan as they it might not be very clear....

    xxx
     
  7. Kimmyj_b

    Kimmyj_b Well-Known Member

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    I feel bad enough about it myself without them chucking it back in my face. I'm not fat just to make their job harder, i would honestly rather not be. It's really made me feel like crap :( x
     
  8. Shell99

    Shell99 Well-Known Member

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    Hi hun

    Like everybody else has said dont let one little ring upset n stress you out. This is your pregnancy. It doesn't feel like it now but it goes quickly and you need to relax n try to enjoy it

    I'm over weight I'm a size 18 :-/ I put loads of weight on during the 18 months before conceiving believe it or not! I'm only 7 wks 6 days (well think they r putting me back a week) I've not had my mw appt yet but I'm guessing they'll try n make an issue of it.

    Difference is- I'm not going to let them. Due to previous complications with my dd I'm expecting to be consultant lead anyway, so the fact my bmi renders me suitable for consultant care makes no odds.

    They will go on about gestational diabetes and poss huge babies (my dd was 3lb 14 oz) I already plan on letting the mw discuss my weight n do her but re poss complications it can cause and THAT'S IT! If I feel they are going on I shall be telling them enough, if I've been through all the poss probs, I don't need to be made feel like crap every time I see mw and then ill start dreading the appt rather than looking forward to it.

    I think you shouldn't let them bother you or continuously make an issue of weight and remember this is your pregnancy, your little baby, and your body. They are providing you a service not doing you a favour.

    Now ill get off my soap box..... I'm struggling with ms (nausea only ATM) but want to start eating healthier now! I'm planning to join slimming world if my mw signs consent form, in an effort to manage my weight. Lots of women manage to lose or maintain on the plan and weekly weigh ins will help me with all that.

    I was going to start a thread in the general pregnancy section 'overweight and expecting' where we could all support each other in out quest to not pile on the lbs, discuss any pregnancy and weight related issues, swap ideas etc.....

    Not sure many would be interested but ill give it a shot later today xx
     
  9. k8_005

    k8_005 Well-Known Member

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    Hey there felt I couldn't read and run so I'm a size 16-18 pee pregnancy but nor unhealthy tho admittedly fat I ran a half marathon last year and a 10k and was swimming or running every other day. I admit my bmi was another reason I was consultant led as well as previous pregs. So I continued to swim for most of my preg and walk but no running I eat smaller portions and ensure more fruit and veg I was 15st7 with a bmi of 36 at booking in appoint now at 38 weeks preg I am 14st,2 and that includes baby who at 36 weeks growth scan was measuring average and 6lb4 perfectly average all measurements fine. They have not weighed me since my booking in appoint so I'm still consultant led what's the point in me worrying about it all. Swimming is good as weightless for joints but don't get hung up on it all they said g.diabetes was a big risk for me and a massive baby ...well screw that baby measures perfect and my gtt test was fine.you can have a healthy pregnancy just be aware of things try and do short walks and swims to help and eat fruit and veg and lean meat iv found my sweeter tooth has gone and I also found people have commented how neat my bump is and how slim otherwise I'm lookin. Be healthy for u and for baby us fatter girls are well aware that it increases the risks and I don't know as single larger lady preg or not who doesn't wish she was slimmer its not worth getting upset about yes be mindful and yes do try n cut down on things that arent healthy but don't let it take over hugs to all xx
     
  10. Kimmyj_b

    Kimmyj_b Well-Known Member

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    Thanks ladies. I try and tell myself not to get upset, it's just really hard. I feel like I won't experience everything the same as a normal mum - kicks, bump and birth etc. I'm a miserable cow today!x
     
  11. jobym

    jobym Active Member

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    hey ladies i didn't want to read and run - just wanted to say that i feel really encouraged from reading your posts. i'm really worried about my weight too, i'm size 16/18 and am coping with a long term illness. due to a lack of mobility i've put on a lot of weight since being diagnosed, and even though i've managed to lose 2 stones whilst ttc i am still dreading conversations about my weight. although saying that i have been to see my midwife and a maternity consultant so far at the hospital to discuss my illness and no one has mentioned my weight yet. i'm 10 weeks now and am trying to do as much swimming and walking as i can to keep myself as healthy as possible. keep strong everyone xx
     
  12. Kimmyj_b

    Kimmyj_b Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like you have a supportive team....I think that I've just been unlucky lol xxx
     
  13. Jojo84

    Jojo84 Well-Known Member

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    When I went to the hospital they described me as "large habitus" I'm aware. If the mw says anything ill tell her I know, I'm eating healthily And by making me feel guilty about it she's putting me under unnecessary embarrassment and stress.
     
  14. Kimmyj_b

    Kimmyj_b Well-Known Member

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    Ordinarily, I would stand up for myself, but anything to do with my weight turns me in to a gibbering wreck.

    They finished my scan this week and nothing on my notes about me being fat which made a pleasant change!
     
  15. k8_005

    k8_005 Well-Known Member

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    Good lets hope there is no more big fuss made xx
     
  16. hellywelly

    hellywelly Well-Known Member

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    I was size 18 and 5ft 9 when I got pregnant with my daughter, with a BMI of 30. Lost a bit of weight with bad morning sickness up until week 14 but ended up putting on 2st 4lbs and apart from the morning sickness my pregnancy was brill, worked up until 37 weeks and could have gone on til the day I had her (easy 5 hour birth with no pain relief)! They wrote the same thing on my scan and I was really annoyed when I googled it! Pregnancies (like the women carrying them) come in all shapes and forms - don't let them constrict you with their expectations!
     

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