feeling down

Discussion in 'Third Trimester' started by Layla, Nov 30, 2005.

  1. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    hi guys,

    im feeling really shit at the mo, guess im just looking for some suport.

    here is why...

    been in hospital with discharge loss, midwifes think its a show but im not convinced, they are guessing Coby is pushing down and coz of his size and weight its made me have one, i think its way to early and want to be checked for other options but they wont. seeing my midwife again tomorrow for another check up.

    also im arguing with all my family again too, it all stems back to my nan at the wedding, after what she did im not talking to her and shes not talking to me, but now my older sister has got involed so i have had her slagging me off for teh past 2 days which has resulted in her telling me to "f*ck off" coz she doesnt want to knowe me anymore.
    basicly my nan has put on the water works and made out like im the nasty one, and that she didnt do half the stuff i said she did at my wedding.
    then my younger sister told me what everyone was saying about me so i had it out with htem, which was wrong co it made things worse, everyone was shoutig at each other over phone/emails and text. my sister ended up going in to labour and shes not due for another 12 days. thankfuly everything is ok tho.

    but the latest is, coz my little sister tol dme about the baby being born first, my older sister is fumming with me and says i didnt have a right to know beofre her etc. but if she hadnt of kicked off calling us all names, maybe she would have been told first!

    im just sick of everything i do being not good enough, everything gets turnt around so its my fault, even tho i havent done anything wrong, at least i dont see that i have anyways.

    sorry to go on, i know im being such a wimp, just feel like crying right now, i dont need any of this right now, just feel like i want t o hide away from everyone now, considering chaging my phone numbers and emails just to get some peace

    thanks for listening to me go on

    xx
     
  2. Skidoo

    Skidoo Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like you're having a rough time. Can't be easy for you. I don't know what the story was w. yr grandma, but I do know what a pain family can be!!

    Don't change you phone number, but do remember that you DON'T have to ANSWER. Lot's of people seem to forget that they can ignore the phone - if it's urgent the caller will leave a message! And try not checking your emails for a while too - just while you get a bit of space for yourself!
     
  3. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    hi skidoo

    yeah i think i will invest in one of those caller ID phones, then at least i can see who it is and choose wether or not to answer it.

    thanks
    xx
     
  4. beanie

    beanie Well-Known Member

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    ((((((massive hugs)))))))

    Families can be a right pain in the a**e at times. I think you need the skills of a diplomat to deal with them at times. Sorry that you are feeling down hun, your family should know that being pregnant is stressful enough without having to deal with all this as well. Your nan is more than old enough to know better!!!

    Try not to worry about Coby either, a show (if that is what it is) doesn't necessarily mean labour is imminant, although it is unfair they aren't lookiing at other options. Kepp strong hun, I know you're not the nasty one xxx
     
  5. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    thanks hun xx
     
  6. Rosebay

    Rosebay Well-Known Member

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    Families can be an utter nightmare can't they? Your priority right now though is you and Coby so a bit of distance and calm is exactly what you need. You can sort stuff out later but it's probably best if you try to avoid getting all stressed out and upset right now as you've got more than enough on your plate. (easier said than done I know but not answering calls etc might help)

    A really cool and incredible thing is about to happen to you :) , try and focus on that, the rest can wait

    (((layla)))

    +++
     
  7. Kerry

    Kerry Well-Known Member

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    Big Hug to you.

    Families are crap aren't they!! Gave up with a few of mine when I had my first two kids just because I didn't want them to have anything to do with my children, caused me enough grief and I didn't want my kids to be part of that.

    I have caller display on my phone (now free with BT) and its a godsend - if I don't know the number or I don't feel like talking to that person then I don't answer. Even if you don't have caller display just let it ring and do 1471 - if you want to ring them back then do, if not then sod em!!
    I have friends who joke that they are privaledged when I answer the phone as it means I WANT to talk to them!!

    Just take it easy - you are not the bad person in all this. You are special and amazing and having a baby so shut everything else out that doesn't fit in with how special you are!!

    Lots of love honey!!
     
  8. Urchin

    Urchin Well-Known Member

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    Awww layla can't your family see that this is the last thing you need?

    Hopefully the babies will bring everyone back together... sounds like you need to talk things over with your nan first....?
     
  9. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    Thanks guys

    urchin, i prob should sort things out with my nan, but i really dont want to anymore, i admit that i am very stubbon, but this is not teh first time shes hurt me or slagged me off, she brought me up when my mum dumps us but she made it clear everyday that me and my middle sister wehre not as good as my older and younger sisters. i have never been able to do right by her no matter how hard i tried, so for me, this is the final straw.
    her and my older sister can both stay out of my life, at least i wont have to listen to them put down or slagging me off anymore. I still have my baby sister, my dad and Jase and his family, its time i cut the negitives out of my life and move on.
     
  10. Urchin

    Urchin Well-Known Member

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    You know what... I haven't spoken to by eldest brother for more than 6 months... I feel so much better for it... I got to the stage when I realised that I didn't need people like that in my life.

    Apparently he's all upset about it, but he knows where I live if he feels like giving me the apology I deserve.

    Sometimes being stubborn is how you make peace with the situation you're in. I'm better off without my brother, maybe you are better off without negative people around you.

    Good luck with whatever you decide.
     
  11. Tiny Sue

    Tiny Sue Well-Known Member

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    Oh, layla...

    *HUG* -your family are being so selfish right now...I yelled at my dad the other day cos I thought he wasn't looking after himself right and he said..."I don't want you getting fussed over me, you don't need that", which nearly sent me into shock because he's never been that way at all!

    Basically, you are happy as a clam with Jase and his family and let the rest of them go hang. ignore the lot and they will feel sorry and come looking for you. Honest, they will...

    Sue
     
  12. Rosieroo

    Rosieroo Well-Known Member

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    {{{Hugs}}} Layla.

    Your family are acting like right shits (like you didn't know that already).

    Ignore them, they aren't worth it. Don't answer the phone, just concentrate on you, Coby and your new DH. They are your family now, the rest can just stick it. They'll come running to you soon enough (if you want them to that is).

    {{{hugs and baby dust}}}
     
  13. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    thanks guys xxxxxxx
     
  14. Tara & Liam

    Tara & Liam Well-Known Member

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    Hi Layla

    I know where your coming from too. I have completely cut out my step family. My mum remarried when i was 13 and i suddenly acquired 4 brothers and a sister.

    After having my oldest step brother have an obsession with me (cant think why anyone would be obsessed with me) my life felt like shit.

    Had Kieran on my own, met a brilliant bloke, had a baby, got married, now having another baby.

    My mum and step dad divorced years ago but he was brilliant to my eldest boy who loved him to pieces. my stepdad died in 2002 and the family went to shit.

    My so called step sister was telling everyone that my hubby was trying to get hold of her (as if). and then i had the good news that they were all considering hiring a hit man to bump off my mum!!!

    so understandably when we moved to eastbourne i cut all ties. best thing that i ever done. jon's family is the family that i always wanted. and best of all i have jon and the boys and thats all the family that i need and want.

    so my advise is if they are making you feel so bad then cut the ties. it will be a relief when you do hun.

    x
     
  15. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    i completely agree with that, I grew up always wanting the perfect family, a mum, dad, sisters and to be happy etc, something thats very rare now a days it seems.

    i gave up hope of getting this untill i met Jase, his family are the perfect family i always wanted and they have welcomed me and my kids in there unit with open arms with no questinos or fuss, so finaly i feel wanted (corney i know) then my own family do thi and bring me right back down.

    so yeah, i am cutting all ties with them, like you said, you have your hubby, kids and his family(now your family) and i have the same in Jase and the kids.

    i still cant belive that jase is with me and that his family like me so much, but im just going to enjoy it and make up for all th years of being on my own

    oh god get the violins out! lol i dont mean for this to sound as dramatic as its coming across, honest lol
     
  16. Tara & Liam

    Tara & Liam Well-Known Member

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    thats the best idea Layla. i dont blame you.

    and what do you mean you cant believe that Jase and his family want and like you.

    we like you on here as well. and i am sure that anyone would be glad to have you in their family.

    x
     
  17. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    aww thanks hun, ignore me, im just feeling really sorry formyself right now, im sure i will snap out of it soon :)
     
  18. Tiny Sue

    Tiny Sue Well-Known Member

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    Layla -

    We are ALL entitled to feel sorry for ourselves sometimes, and you seem to be having a harder time with family than most other people have. So don't hit yourself over the head and talk about it...that's why we're here.

    I agree with davina - we like you on here and any one of us would be glad to have you in our families.

    Take care

    Sue
     
  19. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    aww thanks hun, you just made me cry :roll: lol
     
  20. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    just spoke to my younger sister, the one who had the baby, and the latest is they have all made up,
    my nan started crying saying how terrible she treated her just before she went in to labour, and my older sister has said sorry and made up with her too, they have all been to see her and the baby in hospitla and are back to playing happy familes.

    im still left out in the cold tho
    i really wish i could say i didnt care but i do :(
     

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