Feel so humiliated and upset

Discussion in 'Third Trimester' started by ToriElla, Jan 23, 2006.

  1. ToriElla

    ToriElla Well-Known Member

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    i've been at the hospital most of the night because i'm not full term until wed and they told me to go in as i'm losing pink mucus stuff and getting cramp and tightenings.

    this big huge doctor examined me (did a smear test and internal) but he made me feel so so stupid and really upset me :( he was saying things like 'so what do you think is wrong with you?' and when I explained that i thought i might have lost my mucus plug he was like 'who told you about the mucus plug?'

    I said i read it in my pregnancy information but he kept smirking at me and i broke down in tears when i left the room. now i just can't stop crying. i've had no sleep and now DH has had to go back to work because they said it's nothing.

    even my information from the hospital says if i have any pink coloured discharge to phone the delivery ward which i did.

    just feel so fed up and emotional now :cry:
     
  2. feenix

    feenix Well-Known Member

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    I have pm'd you hun
    xxx
     
  3. Sarah W Baby Belly

    Sarah W Baby Belly Well-Known Member

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    Thats terrible hun

    Loads of people in the medical profession don't like to think that we may have read something or know anything about birth.

    I've mentioned things to my midwife about my babies position etc, and she's just dismissed it, saying its rubbish etc......

    I think they prefer it if we are clueless and just kept quiet. :evil:

    Hope you are feeling better sweetie.
     
  4. Kerry

    Kerry Well-Known Member

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    Oh honey!!

    These male doctors can be horrid.

    How can a man who probably doesn't even understand his own wife, understand the feelings of a complete stranger. I am not a feminist or anything but I have real reservations about men treating pregnant women as it is something that they will NEVER completely understand no matter how many books they read or qualifications they get.

    You are a much better person than him for not ripping his head off!!

    Much love, chin up xx
     
  5. beanie

    beanie Well-Known Member

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    sounds like he was on a power trip :evil: . you can't win, the medical profession wants us to be all clued up about our health, then when we are they don't like it and try to make us feel small. when i started getting pelvic pain i read about spd and mentioned it to my mw who said it was normal pregnancy aches and pains. couple of weeks later when pain was still there she proceeded to tell me i had spd and explained what it was :roll:

    you know your body better then anyone and don't let this nasty man get you down. i would hve done exactly the same. big hugs to u xxxx
     
  6. ToriElla

    ToriElla Well-Known Member

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    thanks :) you're comments are making me feel better. i thought i was going insane and imagining the whole thing!

    i've noticed that they wrote 'uterine activity present. victoria not aware' on my notes. so i don't know if they mean i'm having mild contractions and they think i don't know about it or what.

    i know that i'm having tightenings and feel uncomfortable. i feel like it is the start of things but they basically said that it isn't and not to worry :? the whole thing is so confusing.
     
  7. petchy

    petchy Well-Known Member

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    i hate members of the medical profession who are determined they know best. i have lived in my body for 25 years and i know when something is not normal! they just don't like to think that people are clued up on health, as it makes them look less clever than they like us to perceive them!

    i have been misdiagnosed so many times, and don't trust anyone in a white coat anymore. probably the reason i hate hospitals, doctors and anything clinical. probably the reason for my white coat hypertension, and most definitely the reason for my planning a home birth!!!
     
  8. Sarah W Baby Belly

    Sarah W Baby Belly Well-Known Member

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    Beanie is so right!

    I mean, do these health professionals want us to take an interest in our health or not? :evil: :roll:
     
  9. Kerry

    Kerry Well-Known Member

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    How are you doing planning your home birth Petchy??

    I am having one too - it's so exciting isn't it!!

    Victoria, I really don't think it will be long for you now!! Good luck!!
     
  10. hels

    hels Well-Known Member

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    Aww im so sorry.
    as it has been said, it sounds like he was on a power trip, and by making others feel small, he makes himself feel big (prob got v.small willy!)
    Whilst i was a student nurse i was i made to feel stupid and belittled on many occasions by consultants. many of them are egotistical arses.
    I would have thought that i was well on my way if id had your symptoms, please ignore this unprofessional man. I think its only a matter of time now, and youve got my vote as the first feb mum to 'produce'!!!
    keep smiling hun xx
     
  11. feenix

    feenix Well-Known Member

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    a 3rd
     
    #11 feenix, Jan 23, 2006
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2009
  12. Sarah W Baby Belly

    Sarah W Baby Belly Well-Known Member

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    I'm so excited to hear about these home births!

    I did want to try one but put myself off.

    Can't wait to hear how it all turns out!
     
  13. ToriElla

    ToriElla Well-Known Member

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    I am starting to feel better emotionally thanks! Definitley getting regular tightenings and i just dont feel right. So deep down i feel like this is the start of something.

    i think they try and make it all seem trivial so you aren't worrying but it makes you more confused! My mam said that she was sent home and was back soon after in full blown labour.

    I was just saying to DH on the way home that i totally understand why more women are going for home births now! x
     
  14. beanie

    beanie Well-Known Member

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    Fingers crossed for you hun, hope all goes well xx
     
  15. fayebalina

    fayebalina Well-Known Member

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    Well I personally think that you should write a formal complaint to the hospital.....it makes me so cross when I hear about people like that, it shouldnt go unnoticed!
    Stupid bloody non uterus owning ape!
     
  16. pips

    pips Well-Known Member

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    toriella that is dreadful!
    i got the same sort of thing but with a female doc so i dont think its the sex that affects the personnality: i think its just docs who consider we cant know anything (insulting to miriam stoppard lol) because we havent done all the medical studies, or that they have seen it so many times before they cant understand why we are fussing

    my vote is you note down his name and if you must go back in you insist on not having him anymore, and if you get someone equally as annoying just tell them they are not the one having the baby!!!! :twisted:

    i do hope you are feeling better and are taking good care of yourself... you will prob be in soon you lucky thing! first feb mum, you get the honours good luck
    xx
     
  17. melhoney

    melhoney Well-Known Member

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    I completely understand what you have felt!!! I feel this way everytime I see my midwife!!! I have t ask questions, and even then, she hardly answer them! and when we went to our 1st parentcraft class last week, she was asking questions, to which I knew the answers and she completely ignored my answers!!!!!!!!! :evil:

    The only thing I could say for the hospital is that because you are still in your 36th week, they are trying not to get you too excited so that you can pass to the 37th week at least, when they consider that it's a "normal" birth!!! (I hate this "normal" but that's how they put it at my hospital!!!)

    When I went to the delivery suite, about 1 montn ago now, because I could not feel LO moving, they put me on the monitor for like 2 hours, and there were 2 lines drawn: one was LO heartbeat, but the other one was...my contractions!!!!!! and to my big surprise, there were plenty!!!

    But I could not feel a single one, which they said was normal...so they wrote the same thing on my antenatal notes.

    If you feel something is happening, then it probably is, and sodd this nasty doctor! But take it easy, don't focus too much on it is my advice, so that you get your lovely little one after the 37th week (otherwise they could be even more annoying at the hospital!)

    thinking of you and sending lots of love,

    Mel xx
     
  18. Kim

    Kim Well-Known Member

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    Something probably is happening Toriella, I lost my mucous plug and gave birth the next day! Good luck hun xx
     
  19. ToriElla

    ToriElla Well-Known Member

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    thanks everyone, i'll keep you posted.

    I really want to go into labour now just so i can prove that horrible man wrong!!

    My DH thinks i should write a letter of complaint too. They didn't put his name in my notes though - which is very convenient.

    Hope you all have nicer doctors!! and i hope i never get him again!! xx
     

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