Feeding help

[Punklor182]

Hi we are at the moment feeding every 3 hrs give or take one hr but I find my self getting angry we already have another son who is 4 and I know im on maternity to look after them but I need to know what others have done between the two of you as I find im doing every feed and only getting 4 hrs sleep if im lucky but I find myself in argument with my partner all the time because im tired and his responce only adds fuel to the fire when he says its because he works I plan to go back to my work after maternity but wish he would just help when he is home from work in a month I have done all feeds bar 5 which he still wake me to change baby's nappy I understand he works but his job is very easy I know because I use to work there too but he seems to think that because I have all day off im the only one that has to do it but its killing me I feel like he thinks Ido nothing all day as he comes home and thinks he is helping when he does what he has always done his life has not change since the baby came home (sorry to get to the point)

I want to know how much responsability each of you shared while you were on maternity leave (very sorry if you are a single mum I know how though it is but it makes the up bringing more rewarding im sure) please help as im finding it hard to stop aruguing I know its only because im tired!! Sorry about the lenght

 

[Pumpkin9]

Hey Hun. I was breast feeding up to 3 months and only have the one baby but I can hear myself saying some f the things you've written. I felt overwhelmed at one point, actually many points and it took several blow outs for my husband to appreciate how I was feeling.

In terms of sharing, hubby will do his evening bottle at 8pm when he gets home from work, we take it in turns to do bath time (which is every two days) and we take it in turns to do bedtime.

When Thomas was still having night feeds I did them all as hubby was at work and I wanted him to get a good nights sleep as he has to drive 30 miles to work. He used to help with evening feeds and at weekends with feeds throughout the day. He also changes nappies as and when.

As I said before it's taken sometime to get like this, partly as i think he was abit scared and didn't want to hurt Thomas when changing his clothes so he preferred me to do it and partly because Thomas is alot more interactive now and he loves spending time with him.

I try to find a calm time to explain my frustrations now and say what id like him to do to help. Often it's just a bottle or nappy change so i can have 15 minutes me time. Other times it's feeding him his dinner. Whatever it is I find I have to teach hubby what to do and then he's happy to go with it!

How old is you're little one? Does he help with your older child?

 

[Ella1979]

I'm currently on maternity leave and have a 10 month old and a 2.5 year old. With both of ours, we never had a discussion about who'd do what. With our first, we both got up and would take it in turns to feed, but sit with each other for company. With my son, we shared all night changes and feeds (basically he did the late night ones (up til 1am) and I'd do anything after that, so each of us got a reasonable amount of sleep). He leaves the house for work at 7am and back at 7pm each day.

I know I'm very lucky and most of it's down to my OH's character and he just loves being a hands-on dad. I think it's probably also because me and my daughter could have died, and that kind of puts everything into perspective.

Maybe you should get him to look after your LO for a day by himself and see exactly how "easy" it is. TBH, my job is pretty tough and can be emotionally challenging, but it's nothing compared with looking after a baby and a toddler.