Ex's girlfriend

[Kb180]

Hi dont know if this is the right area....my ex left me for someone else before I found out I was pregnant...he knows I am and says hes going to support which is fine...the problem I have is that he wants his new girlfriend to be involved in all aspects of the pregnancy like coming with him to the scans etc. I want it to just be me and him as it's our child and I feel uncomfortable her being so involved....what should I do?

 

[TTC no2]

Not a chance in hell would I be having partners new girlfriend to scans.
I'd rather go on my own. Just my opinion. Dont feel pressured into what hes asking either.

 

[SockVortex]

It's your baby, your body and nothing to do with the new girlfriend at all. Your ex is invited by all means but you're by no means obligated to have her there.

 

[Kb180]

Not a chance in hell would I be having partners new girlfriend to scans.
I'd rather go on my own. Just my opinion. Dont feel pressured into what hes asking either.

 

[Hannah1678]

End of the day hun it’s your baby, your choice. I think that’s a really strange request by him, very selfish actually. You do what you want todo!!! Xx

 

[Kb180]

Thankyou guys x I'm just scared that if I refuse then he will go off on one and either not go or will be really awkward with things now and in the future x and I want him to step up and be a father as my first borns father was never involved with any of it and hasnt seen the child since birth

 

[chattychar1990]

This is absolutely ridiculous.
There is no way on earth I would be having my ex’s new girlfriend at any scans and appointments and hospitals wouldn’t allow this either due to Covid, your ex may not even be allowed so his bird isn’t going to be allowed.

 

[CrazyChic]

I would tell him to take a run and jump.

And if he doesn't like that, then he will be the one missing out not you. I wish you the best of luck xx

 

[night owl]

It’s so weird that she would even want to go anyway, I mean you don’t know this girl from Adam, who even knows if they will be together in a years time, Totally inappropriate for her to be there

 

[Kb180]

I sort of know her as the three of us worked together...that's how he met her as she came to our workplace during lockdown...I have no issues with her as such but the way she talks about kids in general is disgusting and I want him to be a father but i think hes doing what she says and does because he doesnt want to be lonely and wont listen to anyone else about their concerns...i think I'll let her come with us to the scan and like you said he cant come in so I'll have to facetime him during the scan but future scans I'll ask for him to come without her and if he refuses then I'll know his priorities x

 

[Mrsbridge17]

First of all, I hope you are okay?

From your post I assume you are quite early on in your pregnancy? Reading through and from this girls reaction I don’t feel like they have the best intentions at heart unfortunately. Especially given the circumstances in which you broke up, not speaking from experience but the other girl probably feels very insecure in the relationship as he was unfaithful to you so probably thinks he will go back to you if she doesn’t try to keep him.

I genuinely feel very sorry for you as this isn’t a nice situation you find yourself in. Stick to your guns though and do not allow any involvement from her! This is your pregnancy and your baby so you do it your way xxx

 

[Princess81]

There’s zero chance id let her have anything to do with it. They’ve only been together 5 minutes she’s hardly “step mum”. As things currently stand in a lot of trusts, neither of them will be allowed in anyway. As a midwife I would be very concerned if one of the fathers of my patients insisted on bringing his new partner to any appointments and would likely ask her not to come in anyway. It’s bizarre x

 

[Natalie8964]

I have to agree I cannot get my head round this at all! Why on earth would she want to attend your scans - hello, it's not her baby and has literally nothing to do with her. I'd for sure lose my temper and tell them both where to go!

 

[bellecat]

Why on earth does she want to attend your scans? That’s so bizarre to me! It’s your decision obviously but I don’t think she has any right to ask that.