Dog and Cat's diarys

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by nickilubs, Jan 23, 2008.

  1. nickilubs

    nickilubs Well-Known Member

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    Cat and Dog Diaries
    Excerpts from a Dog's Diary
    6:00 am - At last! I Go Pee! My favourite thing!
    8:00 am - Dog food! My favourite thing!!
    9:30 am - A car ride! My favouritething!
    9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favourite thing!
    10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing!
    12:00 pm - Lunch! My favourite thing!
    1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favourite thing!
    3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favourite thing!
    5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favourite thing!
    6:00 pm - They're home! My favourite thing!
    7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favourite thing!
    8:00pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favourite thing!
    11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing!


    Excerpts from a Cat's Diary
    Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
    They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the otherinmates and I are fed hash or
    some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly
    clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The
    only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust
    them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped
    its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their
    hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely
    made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. [email protected]!
    There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in
    solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the
    noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power
    of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my
    advantage.Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
    tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again
    tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other
    prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special pivileges. He
    is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is
    obviously ******ed. The bird has got to be an informant.i observe him
    communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every
    move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell,
    so he is safe. For now............
     

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