Chores

[Eryinera]

So... I know it depends on the child etc but what chores do your children do and what age were they when they started? My son has gotten away with not doing much we feel mainly due to my health issues and our losses plus him being the only child of two only children and an only grandchild on one side. But enough is enough he is 8 and struffles with basic stuff and he can't see it as an issue!
His jobs:
pack his school bag
Pack his lunch (we make the sandwich and put it in the fridge the night before)
Put his clothes in the washer. (Once/week)
Put his clothes in the dryer. (Once/week)
Put his clothes away. (Once/week)
Tidy his room. (When needed)

 

[Browneyed Girl]

My two are still babies so I haven't got to this stage yet but I think if your son is 8 you're expecting quite a lot. For me packing his bag is something I would do mainly to make sure he's got what he needs for the day and nothing's going to get wrecked and I'd be putting his clothes away (again so it's done properly). Things I would maybe want my boys to do would be taking their plates in the kitchen after a meal, tidying toys away at the end of the day, putting clothes in the laundry basket and maybe getting involved with some cooking as this would be enjoyable and they'd learn as well. As they get older would move onto unloading and loading the dishwasher and helping in the garden etc. Whilst I want them to learn how to do things for themselves and to respect what others do for them I don't want them to spend big chunks of their time doing household chores xx

 

[Eryinera]

See we don't have a dishwasher so he can't do that
He hates cooking
Other than cut the grass there isn't anything else we do in the garden and he obviously can't do that.

For packing his bag all he has to do is put his lunchbox and reading book in his bag that's it. I don't think that's a big ask!
His "toys" aren't over the floor as he prefers to play on the computer he used to put his toys away now he's at computer age so there isn't anything to put away.
His clothes aren't ironed as I iron them in the morning so he can't mess them up if you get me.

The stuff he does doesn't take long except maybe putting his clothes away but that's a once a week job on a weekend.

Just to clarify it's only his clothes he puts in the washer dryer and away. We take them downstairs to to washing machine set it off and out the stuff in like powder etc we take it out the machine take it to the dryer he puts it in we set it off we take it upstairs he puts it away. This is only once a week!


Until recently he couldn't even make his own drink as he expected us to get it for him! He huff and puffs if we have to go out coz he sees it as "his day off" and thinks the world revolves around him as most kids do but he acts so entitled and demands toys and things which if we don't buy him one of his grandparents or great grandparents would. We want to give him a sense of what people do to earn money to pay for all this stuff.

Trust me he needs to do something! He couldn't wash a plate to save his life lol

 

[Shepherdess]

I don't think youre expecting too much. It's slightly different but when I was young my mum was very poorly and from 7ish I did a lot in the house. Way more than I would expect my daughter to but it's certainly doable.

Could he Hoover? Maybe say you expect his room tidy every day, bed made clothes in the wash basket if dirty?

 

[Eryinera]

Thankfully I'm no longer poorly (they found out the cause of my heart condition now it can be managed to a near normal state) so I don't expect him to do too much. And I'm sorry yp had to go through that at such a young age. X x But I think bed snd clothes can certainly be added to his things to do. It's a bit more difficult to sort out his high cabin bed (5 rung ladder to climb up) with a baby and bedding in tow! I'm not looking to add masses of work to him but he wants to get pocket money and I'm loathe to just give it him eith how much he already gets and i's ungrateful for so I'd rather him earn his money much like we did way back when!

 

[MrsS15]

Our son's are the same age and we've started asking him to do things around the house. I'm quite OCD and just go ahead and do everything because I know it'll be done well if I do it, but I know I'm not teaching him anything by doing that. So now we're asking him to

Help set the table for meals
Tidy up after meals i.e. Put dishes in the kitchen, salt away etc
Put his clothes in the washing basket
Put away his clean clothes
Keep his room tidy
and basic tidying at his backside!

We're starting with this and don't think it's too much to ask. I also like browneyed don't want him spending all his time on chores as I think he's got his whole life to do that when he's an adult. But I do want him to be independent in ways and not as spoilt as he has been! xx

 

[Browneyed Girl]

See we don't have a dishwasher so he can't do that
He hates cooking
Other than cut the grass there isn't anything else we do in the garden and he obviously can't do that.

For packing his bag all he has to do is put his lunchbox and reading book in his bag that's it. I don't think that's a big ask!
His "toys" aren't over the floor as he prefers to play on the computer he used to put his toys away now he's at computer age so there isn't anything to put away.
His clothes aren't ironed as I iron them in the morning so he can't mess them up if you get me.

The stuff he does doesn't take long except maybe putting his clothes away but that's a once a week job on a weekend.

Just to clarify it's only his clothes he puts in the washer dryer and away. We take them downstairs to to washing machine set it off and out the stuff in like powder etc we take it out the machine take it to the dryer he puts it in we set it off we take it upstairs he puts it away. This is only once a week!


Until recently he couldn't even make his own drink as he expected us to get it for him! He huff and puffs if we have to go out coz he sees it as "his day off" and thinks the world revolves around him as most kids do but he acts so entitled and demands toys and things which if we don't buy him one of his grandparents or great grandparents would. We want to give him a sense of what people do to earn money to pay for all this stuff.

Trust me he needs to do something! He couldn't wash a plate to save his life lol

That sounds fair enough. Demanding things and not being grateful for gifts isn't a good road to go down so I can understand why you want to nip this in the bud and make him work for things. He should definitely be capable of getting his own drinks and clearing away after himself as a minimum as well as general helping. Maybe you could think about other goals as well e.g. being polite, using good manners, helping you without complaining etc and he can earn money this way. Would he respond to a reward chart style incentive?Hope you find the right balance x

 

[Eryinera]

Thanks x glad others are doing similar things. It's difficult coz we want to give him things when we can afford it but don't want him to expect things! I like the thing about manners that's a good way of giving him money without taking up his time etc. I agree he's got his whole life to do chores too and I would prefer it if he didn't have to do it as it take's 10 times as long when he does it and then it usually needs redoing! Lol. It'smore of a chore for us!

He's responding well to jotting down his rewards in a ledger format not so much a chart but we can see where it goes. Listening and not being a wind up merchant could definitely go on the list lol.

 

[Donna88]

My son is the same age and also an only child.

We do similar to you... trying to do more like you actually, he is in charge of keeping his room tidy (although he's not doing that at the moment it's a tip), putting his dirty washing in the basket, we sometimes get him to put his clean washing away (but he's away a lot at weekends as he goes to his dads, so that doesn't always happen).

We also want to try and get him doing a little more, we don't want him to be doing anything too over the top but like you just want him to realise that he doesn't get everything handed to him on a plate and needs to take some responsibility.

 

[Eryinera]

I've just downloaded 2 apps on my phone and his tablet. Monster chores and it's companion mothership and roostermoney.
Monster chores send chores to his tablet for pointa and he can turn those points into pocket money or other rewards and to keep track of his money I use rooster as it's easy than giving him actual money that I may bot have on me/forget etc.

 

[Donna88]

That sounds good, I might look into them. Thank you

 

[Eryinera]

It has started off to a good start he actually actually asked for chores to be added to the list. Fair enough the chore was "brushing teeth" which I don't count actually as a chore personally more you know personal hygiene lol but if it cuts out a nag in the norning because he wants to tick in off his list I'm hoping things like "do homework" will have a similar effect!

 

[FirstLiner]

As early as 7 years old , I think, it is already good to teach your children to contribute little things in doing some small chores at home. She or he may do the following below:


- Setting the table

- Clearing table

- Putting dishes in sink or dishwasher

- Drying dishes

- Sweeping the floor

- help in watering the plants

I'm sure, kids will get used to it and will grow responsible when they have been doing those things at a younger age.

 

[tinselcat]

My son goes to a Montessori nursery where they encourage children (from a young age) to get involved in practical things. The toddlers love it! My son enjoys setting the table at nursery, helping to mop and sweep the floor, and at home he'd hoover all day if I let him (I don't )

If I show him a clothes washing label, he can correctly tell me whether it can be ironed or go in the tumble dryer. (Apparently this is a fun game).

He's 2.

I don't think you're expecting too much - but your son may need assistance on getting used to a routine, thinking ahead, knowing what to do when, which you could potentially coach him on. The only difficult one there is keeping a tidy room.

xx

 

[Eryinera]

We spent a while day tidying his room. He actually enjoyed it for the most part.

 

[sallygreen]

I asked my 5 year old to do the dishes, and she has helped me with them ever since. She is just at that age when she wants to do grown up stuff, haha.
I think it is fine to start at whatever age (the earlier, the better), as soon as it is not something dangerous.

 

[JustTrying]

just realised how spoilt my nephew is at 11 years old.
Apart from putting his dishes into the sink, theres not much else that is expected of him.

However, when my own child reaches about 7, i want to start intrducing small chores and make it fun for him at the same time. Not sure how I will do that but theres time and I will cross that bridge as it comes. Only thing I want to do is pack his school bag with him so I can keep an eye on homework too. Boys can get very slack about these things.

 

[Eryinera]

Yes we supervise his school bag packing but he's very good he likes the fact he's in the top 5 of his class so he's very proud about handing in his homework on time. (I got a geek yay! Lol)

 

[JustTrying]

Yes we supervise his school bag packing but he's very good he likes the fact he's in the top 5 of his class so he's very proud about handing in his homework on time. (I got a geek yay! Lol)

Aww how proud you must be too x lucky you for having a geek

 

[lilacdoll]

I asked my 5 year old to do the dishes, and she has helped me with them ever since. She is just at that age when she wants to do grown up stuff, haha.
I think it is fine to start at whatever age (the earlier, the better), as soon as it is not something dangerous.

I totally agree with you! That's fine at least she started to learn about chores and responsibilities as early at 5. You are blessed to have her