Children write about the sea

Blackfairykitten

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This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age 6)

Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James, age 6)

If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea
all round you, you are in continent. (Wayne, age 7)

I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
Richardson.
She's not my friend no more. (Kylie, age 6)

A dolphin breaths through an arsehole on the top of its head. (Billy
age
8)

My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs.
(Millie, age 6)

When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the
ocean.
Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make
the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans.
(William, age 7)

I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How
do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen, age 6)

I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always
screaming and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my Mom, and my big
sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age
6)

Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you
a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they
have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher, age 7)

My Mom has fishnets, but doesn't catch any fish. (Laura, age 5)

When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy
small.
(Kevin, age 6)

When me and Sarah went to the sea side in the summer holidays, we hid in
the sand dunes and watched my big sister doing it with her boyfriend. It
was fun. (Lauren, age 7)

A submarine goes under the water like a fish, but it has lots of seamen
inside (Emma, age 5)

When I grow up, I want to be captain of a big ship, and have lots of
sailors.
(Valerie, age 6)

Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't
go
down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky, age 8)

On holiday my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was going
very fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her
fanny. (Julie, age 7)
 
that was soooo funny.

we need to take a jokes portfolio with you into the labour ward. I absolutley love the things that kids say.

x
 
They are really funny. The last one had me in stitches!!! :lol:
 
omg sooooooo funny haha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

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