Caught OH lying BIG TIME

[NicciLove]

Hi Ladies,

This is my first post and im a bit new to all this so please bare with me!

So today I randomly looked at my OH's facebook and saw him tagged in a photo at some girls party dated 2010. I cannot stand this girl, although I know there is nothing going on, she is one of them pathetic facebook stalkers who leaves stupid notes and kisses with no regard how I, his GF will react.
Not to mention she also once called me a nutter when me and OH were having some problems and arguing alot . . long story but i can confirm I am no such thing.

Anyway so I confronted him and asked him, he didnt reply to my text as he is usually busy at work. My mind started going into overdrive and realised that in the picture he has a new shirt on and his hair is long (he was growing it until last week when he cut it short) so i know it was recent.
I could only work out 2 occasions where he had indeed stayed out the whole night without me.

1. he went into london with a friend for xmas shopping and stayed in a hotel
2. he said he was going to a family event which we had an argument about when i asked why i was not invited.

So it turns out that he lied about going to his familys that night and 'staying over because it was snowing and the trains were cancelled' hence why he took an overnight bag.

So please I need advise ladie, i feel like im overeacting. I'm currently 7 weeks pregnant and my emotions are all over the place. I dont want to let this one go, which may indeed make him believe the 'next' time he does this i will get over it.

I dont want to up and leave because i love him and i know he wouldnt cheat but its the lies i cannot stand. I dont want to argue because quite frankly im tired.
His attitude stinks and i need to sort our problems out before our baby is born!! He is admiting he has done wrong, but he acts like he doesnt care how i react.

 

[ToffeePop]

I think the question you REALLY need him to answer - and just saying "oh he'd never cheat on me" is:

Why on earth did he go to a party, LIED to you to say it was a "family" do, take an overnight bag to stay (which is fine, if it was staying overnight at his family's place) if he wasn't thinking of staying over at this girl's party?

Personally, I'd not be giving him any benefit of the doubt "love" or no "love. There's only one reason he'd make a song and dance about you not going IMHO and that would be because he knows you'd be unhappy about his reasons for being there.

If he had initially said "it's because you don't like this girl but she's a friend of mine" then you should have the option of going and being polite, or not going at all but knowing the truth. I'd be livid. I don't "do" lies...

He's lied about it. I'd be packing his bags...

 

[becks20]

Hi hun sorry to hear this. My ex (my daughters dad) lied to me alot after 3 years being together he said he was doing overtime but he was out with a woman from work etc etc if he has lied then whats to say he wont lie again or cheat? I gave my ex so many chances and this time when we split i new he would never change but i loved him and its been a year since we split and i still love him BUT as my daughters dad not as anything else! Just do what you think is right tell him that its not right what he done and say that if he wants to lie then he should be with someone else. Good luck hun sorry im prob not much help! x

Also want to add its hard to say to someone "Its over" BUT it has to be done sometimes and it does get easier once youve been apart from the person and im sure you will have alot of support from us on here and family and friends! x

 

[NicciLove]

I guess he just found it easier to lie because he knew i would be upset and give him grief for going! I am livid but trying not to over react for the sake of our unborn child! I could quite easily give him two black eyes right about now lol

I just dont know why I am the one feeling guilty for being angry at him, its always been like this

Thanks for your advise ladies really apprechiate an outsiders opinion on things xxxx

 

[Rowesb]

I think u really need to talk to him and find out why he lied

 

[megsmeadow]

Everyone has their reasons for lying, whether they are wee white lies or big whoppers! My ex lied his way into a double life, I still don't know how on earth he managed it. Ask, ask and ask again if you still don't feel you're satisfied with the answer. I put up with too many daft excuses and was always made to feel in the wrong. It's not easy!!! X

 

[x-misspinkuk-x]

oh hun, you need to ask him what his reason for lying was! and you have nothing to be feeling guilty about hun. you need to be happy and secure for your letting one. hope you get it sorted xx

 

[Piglet10]

dont feel guilty. if i was you put him out.... he will make it up to you etc if hes worth keeping otherwise why would he stop his behaviour....

if he doesnt make it up to you he was never going to b any good for you anyway ....

sorry to b so blunt but i hate to see women puttin up with shit... my mum always tells me its took her to her 40s to realise that men will always come back with their tails between their legs and if they dont you were going to put up with a lifetime of shit... i agree with her.

sorry for being harsh xxx