Breast Feeding in public?

keelie_b

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i struggle to have the confidence to just feed Dylan in a cafe somewhere - silly i know but im proud and also lucky to be able to breast feeding and it would bother me if people were judging me or think i was disgusting. i know its not but theres ignorant people in this society who have no idea - as proved in the post in the adult section :evil:

so how do you feed your LO in public? is there somewhere out the way i could go? i feel very unhiegenic(sp) feeding Dylan it a gross shopping centre toilet :oops: :puke:

I know i could express but then i've still got to find time to do that, then when im out, find somewhere to warm the bottle and if im out all day my boobs will get very uncomfortable and leak like crazy.
so any advice what to do when out and about?

Thanks :)
 
Boots should have a room for feeding mothers. I say should as ours is out of order!!!
Other than that i sit in a cafe, i go in the corner with my back to people! I was terrified at first, scared of her waking for a feed. But when that time came i just went for it! I get stares and people nudging each other to look. But i don't care. I sit with a sausage roll and a cuppa while she's eating! Be proud! You are doing a wonderful thing!
 
I felt a bit uncomfortable the first few times I BF in public but you do get used to it! - having said that I do choose somewhere I feel most at ease - I often try to find a corner of a cafe where I can hold baby nearest the wall and I do notice who is seated nearby! ..if it's a few tables of ladies I will sit there, if there are some dodgy looking blokes I probably wouldn't ! - Just wear a fairly loose fitting top so your whole tummy isn't on show and hold the babies head across in front of your boob, no one can see anything then. Best of all take a friend with you who can give out challenging looks to anyone who may glance over disapprovingly! - sisters are good for this too! Your baby has the same right to have lunch in a pleasant and clean environment as anyone else, I don't think you will find too much prejudice as long as you are discreet.
 
I used to be so so shy about BF my DD, but now after bf for 12months, I give her mummy milk anytime and anywhere she wants! I pop them out all over the place! :oops:
 
I always wear a lose fitting vest (in the same colour as my top) so I can pull my top up and the vest down over my boob, this way my stomach isnt showing and I dont feel so exposed. I sometimes drap a small blanket over my shoulder. At first I was very apprehensive but now I am a lot more confident. I can honestly say i dont think anyone has ever taken any notice. Mothercare/debhenams/marks and spencers all have feeding rooms in my area but I never use them now!
 
Places like Mothercare and Debenhams have feeding rooms but I've never used them as I just get on with it in a cafe. Usually I just pick a quiet table out of the way and then sit with my back to the room. No-one has ever said anything to me with either of mine and even if did I'd tell them to eff off!
 
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I still feel a bit uncomfortable about it and try to time going out around feeds! I wish I felt more confident but it's easier said than done - I just tell myself if he's hungry I have to feed him and try to make it as easy as possible for myself. I try to time going out around feeding times but if he does need feeding I find somewhere quiet and put a blanket over me and baby. The other day someone tried to have a look at baby and said they didn't realise I was feeding him so it must look fairly discreet. You can get breastfeeding shawls which look nice but I think a blanket probably works just as well.
 
I don't have a problem with the body side of it, I'm happy to get them out as I know I can get her latched without showing much off. My first problem is my let down, so if it's the second feed of the day (a full one) then I'll need loads of muslins, normally a second pair of hands too. The thing that I really hate though, is waiting to see if anyone's going to have a problem with it. I don't know what I'd do if someone said something, I'd probably just cry and I want to have loads of comebacks!
 
I am usually fine feeding in public but Cally wants to see everyone and smile at them so I have taken to feeding either hidden in a far away table or I find a feeding room - some larger shopping places do these. My local Boots is teeny but very helpful, they let me sit in the private prescription bit so I can feed without Cally coming off every minute for me to spray my milk everywhere.

If you spot someone staring just smile at them. I have found most people who do stare do so because they are really positive about feeding but too shy to come over and talk, and I usually end up having some old dear telling me how lovely it is to see a baby being breastfed.
 
beanie said:
If you spot someone staring just smile at them. I have found most people who do stare do so because they are really positive about feeding but too shy to come over and talk, and I usually end up having some old dear telling me how lovely it is to see a baby being breastfed.

That's such a good point, if you're conscious of people disapproving, you'll assume that's what they're doing when they look.
 
I have something similar to this: http://www.onceborn.com/catalog/product ... cts_id=340
but I havent used it yet. I wonder whether the rather garish design attracts people to look more?! I see on this website they're available in black however. I have yet to try BFing in public - instead I am like a timed bomb everytime I go out, dashing home for the next feed. Terrible really, I don't know why I just don't bite the bullet......!
 
ive fed all three of mine out in public. tbh i've never really thought about it, it's just something that needed to be done, so i did it!

i did have a 2nd thought when i needed to feed oliver in work (i work in a bookshop), and benjamin was looking at the kids books, so i just sat on the chairs there and fed him. was quite uncomfortable with people who i work with coming over and cooing over him, not realising i was feeding until he coughed and pulled off lol

soon got used to it though, had to talk to my manager about something and i had oliver with me, so i just fed him.

im over the embarrasment side of it. ive never noticed anyone disaprooving, but i have seen someone bf in public and i look over and i think aww that's so nice, and i got such a nasty look back, but i was just genuinly pleased to see someone so confident to feed like that.

maybe we should be more encouraging to people who look at us while were feeding. maybe not everyone is looking down on us!
 
In our town I have gone to Mothercare, Boots, Marks and Spencers, Toys R Us, John Lewis (the best by far!). We just went to places to eat which had more room and I could face away from everyone - we found the Slug and Lettuce good as it had sofas and was spaced out so that people werent on top of each other.
 
I was nervous at first but I soon got used to it, I think you will find that most people dont even notice if you do it discreetly. I practised infront of a mirror lots so I felt more confident that nothing was on show and I soon felt better about feeding in public. There should be feeding room in supermarkets and other stores, maybe ask around as you may just have never noticed them before? x :hug:
 
I agree, I always smile at folk breastfeeding in public, its a nice sight!

Ive never had any funny looks at all. I was nervous too, but I chose a baby group to do my first public feed, as I knew no on would bat an eye lid. Once confident, you can do it anywhere! (Almost!) Coffee shops are usually fab, as there will no doubt be other Mums in there doing the same!

Ive found my own style of doing it discreetly, you will too. Use the pram as a shield from prying eyes if you feel exposed on one side. Wear a vest under your loose top to hide your tum. You could even drape a pashmina / scarf over your shoulder on the side you are feeding from, which hides babys head and your boob. Helpful for stopping baby getting distracted too.

Good luck, please dont let it put you off, you should be so proud, you are obviously a good mummy! :hug: xx
 
I think the only reason i found it difficult to begin with was because i have never, ever, ever seen a mother breastfeed in public! Round here bottles are the absolute norm and if i say i am breastfeeding (particularly as long as i have) i always get asked "Why?" Only the other day i mentioned to someone i was still feeding and she didn't understand why i was still going with it! Breastfeeding is very unheard of round here. I feel like a display of the weird to some people.
 
LisaJ1986 said:
I think the only reason i found it difficult to begin with was because i have never, ever, ever seen a mother breastfeed in public!

Same, even now i've only seen one other mum BFing and that was in the feeding room of a JohnLewis, i have however met more mums who are BFing past 6 months now so i don't feel like i'm completely on my lemon!

Have you considered buying a sling? I used to use mine to BF DD in public, no-one ever knew i was feeding her and it was ultra snuggly for us both. Not sure if she fits in it like that anymore but by the time your LO gets to her age you may have built up your confidence.

FWIW no-one has ever said anything negative to me whilst i've been feeding DD, and i dont always do my best to hide it.
 
With my DD being 17 months now i don't have an issue with feeding her in public as i'm so used to it.

She very rarely needs feeding in public now but isn't very well atm :( . I needed to go to Asda today and she was whinging cause she wanted feeding so i just sat in the cafe with a drink and fed her there. There is a baby room in my local Asda but it stinks of dirty nappies :puke: . I also think it's important that mothers do breastfeed in public as i think the more it's seen the better and it might encourage more people to do it :)
 
I don't breastfeed, but I am one of the people that looks when others do, because I think it is great to see women breasfeeding with confidence in public. I do always smile though so that they know I am not disapproving. Most places round here have feeding rooms, but they are often baby changing rooms too and I wouldn't want to feed LO in the equivalent of a toilet.
 
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I didnt get to the stage of breastfeeding in public but i was quite happy to whip my boobs out in hospital, at home and to the neighbour. I can understand how others find it difficult though.

I believe there are many ways of hiding the actual boob now and when i was pregnant i bought a couple of breastfeeding tops from H&M. There is like a little envelope to poke your nipple through.. very discrete.

I personally think its a wonderful thing and i think its such a shame that there are people out there who dont find it "appropriate".

Claire x
 

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