boyfriend

Discussion in 'Second Trimester' started by -, Jun 19, 2005.

  1. Guest

    my family have just put a deposit down this morning for a four bedroom house so that me and my baby can stay at home - now my boyfriend has
    sed it is either move in with him or we brake up i love my boyfriend but he has let me down since he has knowen about the baby and my family have been great even moving when they dont want to any ideas on how to solve it?
    please all help needed
     
  2. Kim

    Kim Well-Known Member

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    It depends on whether you love and want to be with your boyfriend but I would say stick with your family, they sound great and at least you know they will be there no matter what. If he breaks up with you over that maybe it wasn't meant to be?? If you wanted to be with him I think you would know what you need to do. Just because you have a baby doesnt mean you will never meet anyone else who will love both you and your child.

    You have to do what feels right for you.

    Hope it all works out good for you.
     
  3. Blossom

    Blossom Well-Known Member

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    He's got no right to dish our ultimatums like that, especially when you are pregnant and vulnerable. He isn't in charge here - relationships are a two way thing and if he loves you he will have to listen to what is right for you at this time. Don't let him call the shots, talk it through and don't be bullied. If you are going to move in together, then it shouldn't be because you didn't have any choice. It's the wrong foot to start on and you will spend you life worrying about when he's going to change his mind and kick you out. If he thinks he's the one in control here, then it sets your path up for the future.

    It doesn;t sound to me like he's thinking about your feelings, just his own. You don't need that level of selfishness in your life right now so set him straight.



    There's quite a lot to consider in your situation. Are you family only moving because of the baby? Would they otherwise be happy where they are if you moved in with your boyfriend? Would they get the deposit back? If you turned round tomorrow and said you were moving in with him, how would this affect your relationship with your family?

    If I were you I'd have a big talk with your family, because it wouldn't be fair to have them move house, only for you to move out in a few weeks because of your boyfriend, unless they don't mind moving anyway. Moving house is a huge and expensive committment on their part, you need to be fair and upfront with them.

    Good luck and let us know what happened...
     
  4. Pansy

    Pansy Well-Known Member

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    Not to be harsh but maybe he is just looking for a way out...It isn't fair for him to put that on you when you are already on a roller coaster of emotions...I would stick with your family and if he truly loves you and wants to be part of the baby's life then he will stick by your side with whatever decision you make...And if he does stick by you and supports your decisions then I would think about moving in with him...But even with all our advice,ultimately in the end this is a decision you have to make on your own...And hopefully whatever you do decide everything will work out for you...I wish you luck and I hope everything turns out well for you...
    Pansy
     

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