BFP Tuesday and Wednesday, BFN today :(

Discussion in 'Coping with Miscarriage & Loss' started by RobsLouise, Jan 27, 2012.

  1. RobsLouise

    RobsLouise Well-Known Member

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    Well I had a chemical pregnancy back in October and been ttc since then. Started spotting on Sunday and thought it was the start of af but when nothing came of it (more spotting but no more than a staining) and my temps were still high I decided to take a test on Tuesday morning and got a bfp 1-2 weeks on a digi. I was not too hopeful due to the continued spotting but I did another test (FRER) in the afternoon and bfp. Wednesday morning did another FRER and stronger line so I felt a bit better but I was still spotting although it was getting lighter in colour.
    I felt funny yesterday, had what I can only describe as an itchy feeling inside my uterus- it wasn't pain so much as discomfort. I woke up at about 2am in a hot sweat and desperate for a pee so I decided to do my last digi to see if things were progressing but I was gutted to see a bfn. I cried, went downstairs, cried some more and wondered why the hell my body can't sustain a pregnancy past 17dpo. I did another test this afternoon- FRER really, really faint line but could easily be evap. Either way hcg is obviously fast disappearing. The few symptoms I have this early on are still here and I haven't had any bleeding yet. The spotting stopped completely on Wednesday.
    I'm just waiting to bleed now, to be honest I just want this over with. I feel so crap, like I failed again. Last time I was 5 weeks pregnant 17 dpo this time I'm 4 weeks 3 days but again 17dpo- something seems to be stopping my pregnancies from implanting properly. My mum said not to test early which pissed me off- I tested the day I was due af and the day after and to be honest I'd rather know that I had lost a pregnancy so I can maybe get some help than carry on ttc and believing I can't get pregnant. Does that make sense?

    Sorry for the long post, I just feel so down.
     
  2. Ker31

    Ker31 Active Member

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    U poor thing, I know there are no words to make it better, I'm so sorry, its awful to go from being so elated to so disappointed, maybe you should try talk to your doc and see if there is anything they can do for you, there must be something
     
  3. Sunbeam638

    Sunbeam638 Well-Known Member

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    Ker is right, go to the docs it might be the case you need a little help during the early stages. I'm so sorry to read this xx

    You can concieve so definitely see the doc. Hope your ok big :hugs:
     
  4. leesey

    leesey Well-Known Member

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    Your story could easily be me talking 3 months ago. I've had quite a few losses, all early before 5 weeks, and got really fed up with my mum telling me not to test early. As if I wouldn't know when my period was late! She kept saying 'we're not supposed to know that early on' and treated it as if it wasn't a real pregnancy because it didn't progress. Really upset me.
    Anyway, 3 months ago, I got my bfp but didn't let myself get my hopes up because of my history. A few days later, as per usual, I started getting fainter lines, and got a Not Pregnant on the digi. So I just waited to bleed, assuming the worst.

    One week later, still no bleed and in the middle of the night decided to do a test and low and behold it was positive! Did a digi and got my Pregnant 1-2 weeks! I sprung into action and started taking high dose folic acid (5mg rather than the usual 400mcg) and baby aspirin, and on doctor's orders avoided stress at all costs.

    And here I am, now into my second trimester, and touch wood all is well :)


    Bottom line is, even if this is another loss, don't give up hope xxx
     
  5. laurat

    laurat Well-Known Member

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    Im sorry Honey! xxx
     
  6. dyscochick

    dyscochick Well-Known Member

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    I'm sorry hun, but do talk to docs, they might be able to make some suggestions if implantation looks like the problem
     
  7. Munz

    Munz Well-Known Member

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    I'm sorry for ur loss hun, I do think u should speak to ur doc as soon as u can.. best of luck to u x
     
  8. Spinneygirl

    Spinneygirl Well-Known Member

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    Sorry hun xxx
     
  9. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Hi Louise,

    I have had 3 miscarriages - two of which have been early (5w and 6w)

    I am not under the care of a recurrent miscarriage clinic.

    I am not sure how it works in your catchment area but it may be worth trying to get referred to a specialist? Where I live thery were very specific about only referring you after 3 losses BUT there is no harm in trying?

    At the very least get these losses on your medical records hun

    Sorry there is nothing more I can say to help - sadly I do not have my answers yet nor am I any closer to having a sticky bean

    xxxxxxxxxx
     
    #9 CARNAT22, Jan 30, 2012
    Last edited: Jan 30, 2012
  10. RobsLouise

    RobsLouise Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for all your messages.
    I had a really rubbish weekend, spent all day Friday waiting to bleed but just had a bit of spotting. I kept having odd pains but no period type cramps like I was expecting. By the end of the night I had a funny turn and I think I may have been going into shock- I was shaking uncontrollably and felt like I was going to pass out. This set off a panic attack and in the end my husband took me to A&E. After I'd had my stomach felt I could feel cramps starting up and I started to bleed and I felt instantly better, it was just painful. They didn't seem to get that I hadn't gone to hospital because I believed I was having a miscarriage but that I had gone into shock and I thought the blood was stuck! 4 hours later I saw an obstetrician who told me not to worry about it as it was just my period starting! I was gobsmacked. I'm 34 years old in a couple of weeks and I've had plenty of periods to know that what I was experiencing was not a period starting. He told me that my blood results showed a hcg level of 5 and therfore I was never pregnant. I said I'd had 3 positive pregnancy tests and how could that happen if I didn't have hcg in my urine. He said he couldn't answer that but that the blood results were low. I just felt like I was going mad. I was getting angry and I said that surely it wasn't unreasonable that the results were so low given that my pregnancy tests had turned negative when I tested at 2.30am on Friday. By the time I had blood taken it was 24 hours after I did my pregnancy test and for all I know i could have had a negative test if I'd done one on Thursday. I might have had a peak of hcg on Wednesday when I did my last positive test but it could have been going down from there. He told me he would have expected a level of atleast 1000! I just needed to get out of there.
    As I was leaving he said that I should go to my doctor as seeing as this was the second time I'd had an early loss I obviously needed some investigations!! WTF! After 10 minutes arguing with me that I was never pregnant to start with he then admits that I was!
    I felt like he had invalidated everything I'd been feeling and all the way home I was questioning everything. Saturday morning I was just numb, I couldn't talk to my poor husband. I hadn't gone to hospital because I was or wasn't pregnant I'd gone because I felt really unwell and I was worried it could have been ectopic or something.

    Anyway, I am seeing my doctor tomorrow morning. I'm making a list of everything I want to say and I'm hoping that given my age and the fact that the only times I've been pregnant have ended before they even got implanted properly that I will get some help.

    Sorry, another long post!
    Thanks again for all your replies.
    L
     

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