Back into ttc or wtt until Feb?

[kumber]

We're back in ttc after an early mc. We don't know whether to try over the next to cycles and then wait until Feb to avoid a summer baby, or not try in these next two cycles at all and put off ttc until Feb. We feel we're ready to try again but I wonder we rushing into it?

 

[CoolNoMore]

Kumber, I'm so sorry. My inner child is jumping up and down yelling 'but that's not fair'!

Why would you avoid a summer baby? I'm asking out of curiosity - I'm ttc my first, so I'll take whatever comes, whenever (sooner rather than later though, if I get to choose...wait, I don't get to choose? Rubbish.)

It sounds like a cliche, but everyone is different. If you both feel you're ready, then go for it. Women in my family tend to pretend miscarriages didn't happen and get back to it asap, which doesn't seem particularly healthy (!) but my best friend felt much more positive knowing she was getting straight back in the saddle (so to speak).

Pff, I'm no help. Talk about sitting on the fence Whatever is right for you is right for you.

 

[phonixgirl]

I'm so sorry, kumber. I'd start now as you don't know how long it could take and the baby could end up being born early anyway! I used to worry about having an August born baby because of the school year but after this long I don't care. Xxx

 

[kumber]

Kumber, I'm so sorry. My inner child is jumping up and down yelling 'but that's not fair'!

Why would you avoid a summer baby? I'm asking out of curiosity - I'm ttc my first, so I'll take whatever comes, whenever (sooner rather than later though, if I get to choose...wait, I don't get to choose? Rubbish.)

It sounds like a cliche, but everyone is different. If you both feel you're ready, then go for it. Women in my family tend to pretend miscarriages didn't happen and get back to it asap, which doesn't seem particularly healthy (!) but my best friend felt much more positive knowing she was getting straight back in the saddle (so to speak).

Pff, I'm no help. Talk about sitting on the fence Whatever is right for you is right for you.

This has given me a right giggle! You're right, it's not fair but such is life I suppose. I am very lucky with my boys so I'm grateful for my blessings.

I'd rather avoid a summer baby because I cannot cope with the heat. My boys were June and August, it was awful. Particularly woth ds2, I literally cried my way through the summer. I'd be happy with June or July but being in tri 3 when I carry big babies makes me feel physically ill. And bump sweat is vile.

I'm so sorry, kumber. I'd start now as you don't know how long it could take and the baby could end up being born early anyway! I used to worry about having an August born baby because of the school year but after this long I don't care. Xxx

I'm thinking to start now too, just so I feel like I'm doing something. My youngest is August and it doesn't bother me in terms of schools, it's being heavily pregnant through the height of the summer that I'm trying to avoid. Done it twice, would rather not a third time!

 

[CoolNoMore]

Oh, I see! That does sound like an excellent reason to avoid a summer baby.

 

[kumber]

If I did have another summer baby, I would still be overjoyed of course. I would just get in lots of tissues to wipe up another summer of tears

 

[phonixgirl]

Awww! Or hopefully it's not as big this time! Xx

 

[kumber]

I would hope but hubby is 6ft 2 so it's unlikely!

 

[MummyBee]

If you feel ready id say go for it! i know a few friends who had mc's and were pg next cycle xx

 

[BunnyN]

I got pregnant the next cycle after my 1st loss and I admit there were both positives and negatives to it. It was quite hard emotionally to be on such an up and down roller coaster and I think it did make it hard for me to relax and enjoy the 1st half of pregnancy.

After my second loss we were supposed to wait at least 3 months to try because I had a bad time physically and needed time to get my strength back. I admit though that when it came to it we couldnt bring ourselves to actively prevent pregnancy so we basically just carried on. It took me 5 months to get pregnant again so I think my body knew best. I think it was quite a good gap and meant that the emotions were not as raw when I did get pregnant again. However if I did it over I still dont think I'd be able to bring myself to wait, lol. I did feel like a huge relief to me when I got pregnant again. It gave me something positive to dwell on(I started looking forward to due date, scan dates etc instead of constantly thinking about what was never going to be. Although I'll never forget the baby we lost, being pregnant again made things feel like they were back to how they 'should be'.

So my gut will always say to go for it as soon as possible and think later . On a more sensible level maybe think about how you will feel if you don't get pregnant in the two months. It could be really hard emotionally if you dont get pregnant and then have to pause TTC again which puts more pressure on you to get your BFP quick. It might just be smoother to wait until after.

The only time I really didnt want to get pregnant was with a due date close to Christmas (because of MW going on holiday). We almost took a break for a month but didnt and that was the one I got pregnant, oops . I can see how its sensible to avoid a summer baby. I am struggling a lot with the heat. We live in Portugal, so hot summers. I have been willing September to come. Now it is Sep but has been unseasonably hot so cant wait for it to pass. I'm only 26 weeks so actually being due in the summer would be murder.

Really no one can tell you the right time to TTC. You need to do what feels right to you.

 

[kumber]

Thank you hun. I totally get where you're coming from with the emotional roller coaster. We've talked it over and agreed to try over the next 2 cycles, and if it doesn't happen that's ok. I'll be disappointed but I know I can conceive and carry to term so I'd just put it down to the time not being right. I've got my head around the fact that we are unlikely to conceive until February

 

[BunnyN]

I haven't had big problems getting pregnant and we have two LOs so we have been fortunate in some ways too. I'm afraid it didn't stop me being super impatient to get pregnqnt again this time though . I guess I felt the pressure of age a bit too because I will be 37 next month. Although we have had two losses, like you I don't think they were caused by anything in particular, just random defects, maybe in part related to my age.

I hopè TTC goes well for you!