Are you an only child???

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by *Star*, Jan 11, 2008.

  1. *Star*

    *Star* Well-Known Member

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    I'm the eldest of four and i loved having a brotheer (whose 8 atm) and my sisters (now 17 and 13).

    I would never have had just one child, cause i loved being part of a big family!
     
  2. Slinky Sarah

    Slinky Sarah Well-Known Member

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    personal
     
    #2 Slinky Sarah, Jan 11, 2008
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2009
  3. Babylicious

    Babylicious Well-Known Member

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    I'm one of 8 and wouldn't be without most of them, always nice to have family.

    Paris was on her own until we decided to have another - seriously she's a brat with a capital B and has trouble playing with other kids. They get lonely too and too much adult attention isn't good.
     
  4. Tillytots

    Tillytots Well-Known Member

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    :think: thats a hard one...

    Im the eldest of 6 ( I have 4 younger bros & a little sis the youngest whos 10 ) and wouldnt have it any other way. I love being part of a tribe :lol: Now they're all growing up I have to start having my own babies. I miss having LO's around all the time. Ive always wanted 4 of my own so I vote have more! the more the merrier :) I have never heard of 'only child syndrome' though. I just googled it and it sounds a bit wack. I think if your child frequently interacts with their peer group then I cant see the prob...they'll learn to share and their skils etc

    Dont worry about it yet though! Wednesday is getting so big now bless her! She looks cool 8)
     
  5. Urchin

    Urchin Well-Known Member

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    Personally I would not have wanted Mason to be an only child, with a sibling they always have someone to turn to, someone to play with, someone else for when we're not around.
    Mason was on his own till he was 4 1/2 ...we'd visit his friends houses who had siblings and he'd have such fun, then I'd feel awful when I had to bring him home on his own with no one to play with, and his friend would still have his brothers and sisters around.. Now him and Brody are best buddies and have such fun with each other, they are a joy to watch, and so funny!
    I have 2 older brothers BTW.
     
  6. elaine22

    elaine22 Well-Known Member

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    I grew up an only child and hated it - I longed for a big brother lol. I lived in a fairly quiet village as well so was quite boring a lot of the time with no one to play with. I suppose it was nice being the sole focus of my parents and that but I would much rather have had a sibling. I think it's lovely when people have a few brothers and sisters. :D Saying that, my mum has 11 brothers and sisters and only speaks to about two of them lol.

    ETA: I was always a very shy child and never made the first move making friends - I don't know whether that was because I didn't interact with another child so much? Although I know only children who are hugely confident!
     
  7. Krystal

    Krystal Well-Known Member

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    I class myself as an only child. I say that because I didn't have a brother and sisters till I was 11 and even then that was through my dad who lived 2 hours away so I hardly ever saw them.

    My OH is also an only child and we've both agreed we don't want Jack to grow up as an only child. I had a lot of friends growing up but I was so envious of my friends who had brothers and sisters and always wished I had them too. I remember one time going to Mother Shiptons Cave and chucking some coins in the wishing well and wishing for a brother or sister. :(

    Obviously there are benefits, I wanted for nothing and was always spoilt rotten at Christmas and birthdays but I knew this was because I was the only one so my mam could afford it. :)
     
  8. monster_munch

    monster_munch Well-Known Member

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    I'm an only child and can honestly say I hated it.
    And if I'm completely honest, it has made me into a very spoilt and selfish person :oops: I always found it hard to relate to my peers as a child - adults were fine, I was used to their company. I honestly think I would be a much better person if I had had siblings :(

    It was my main deciding factor when I started TTCing this LO.
    DH was more than happy for DD to be an only child, in fact he took quite a bit of convincing, but I didn't want her to go through the difficulties and loneliness(sp) that I did.
     
  9. monster_munch

    monster_munch Well-Known Member

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    :hug: :hug:

    But random point - I don'tlive a million miles from there - we go like 3/4 a year :lol: sometimes we just sit by the river in the car park!
     
  10. fifi211

    fifi211 Well-Known Member

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    I have 2 older sisters and am glad that I am not an only child. I personally would have been quite happy to have just had Jamie as I don't particularly enjoy pregnancy and didn't take to childbirth that well, but over the last year I have realised that Jamie does need a sibling. He started asking if he could have a brother or sister and hubby wanted another and now here I am expecting number 2 :D (That's definitely it though :talkhand: )
     
  11. Krystal

    Krystal Well-Known Member

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    It's lovely isn't it! OH has never been so I have promised him in the summer we are gonna drive up and take Jack, I like the waterfall thing that makes boots and shoes turn to stone (I think thats what it does anyways :lol: )
     
  12. Tangerinedream

    Tangerinedream Well-Known Member

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    I am and am not an only child lol, I experienced the worst of both worlds. I grew up as an only child until I was 13 when my mum adopted a friend of the families daughter as her mother died and there was nobody else able or willing to take her on so we welcomed into our family. She was 7 at the time so there was a 6 year age gap.

    Before she joined our family I hated being an only child. I was very lonely. My mum worked full time as she was a single parent so I didnt get the oppertunity to do stuff except play out or watch TV. I used to visit my grandparents a few times a year who would take me and my cousins out and on holiday.

    When my sister came to join us she had a lot of emotional and behavioural problems due to her past (her parents were druggies/criminals) and very often made life difficult. Dispite this I wouldnt have had it any other way. When we got along things were brilliant and as I was that little bit older we would get money to go swimming/to the museum/fair etc.

    I really want another child in a few years time but my OH doesnt. Although he was an only child his parents did everything with him, took him places, fun holidays so as far as he is concerned there is no downside to being an only child. Oh, and I would say he definately has only child syndrome :lol:
     
  13. charlie84

    charlie84 Well-Known Member

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    I like you midna, i have grown up with siblings, but me and OH were thinking of just having one child.
    I am a little concerned at how it may affect her growing up with no siblings as i agree with what the other girls are saying, it would be nice as she would have someone else to play with etc.

    I am getting more and more unsure about leaving her as an only child as i get closer to the birth.
    Think i should get through giving birth with this one before considering another baby :roll: :rotfl:
     
  14. Sherlock

    Sherlock Well-Known Member

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    I'm an only child from my parents marriage. My father had two more children much later but they never lived or stayed with us and I am not close to them. I consider myself an only child.

    I had a really happy childhood. I was a bright, cheerful outgoing child and was easily able to amuse myself. My mother was a single parent and juggled working full time and bringing me up.

    I think she got the balance right, I had play dates, friends over, pen pals, pets and the like. I don't feel I missed out by not having a sibling. My mother was always honest and said she was never really maternal and only ever wanted one child. She felt she was able to provide fully for one, even if she struggled sometimes (my father never paid a penny). I went on school holidays, learnt to ride, kept a pony, things she would never have been able to afford had she had another child.

    I think obviously modern living is a different kettle of fish, but I think so long as a child is not spoilt by being an only child, does not get to involved using TV or DVD's, computer games and the like for their social life but interacts with other people, children, they can be well rounded individuals. Doing things like group activities when younger is good, be it joining the local football team, or signing up to Rainbows or Brownies, so a child gets lots of group socialising and develops those important skills.

    Also not making an issue of the lack of siblings is important also. I never asked my mother why I didn't have a brother or sister. It never really occured to me to miss having one.

    Its important to encourage a single child to be able to amuse themselves. They cannot rely on other kids all the time to make their fun, nor can they expect their parents to do so all the time either. I was always happy to go play and make mud castles or do some gardening, climb trees, pretty much everything. I don't think I ever struggled to find something to do. I was also encouraged to be an avid reader. Some days my nose would be in a book from waking to sleep.

    I don't think there are any hard and fast rules for single children. I like to think that as a girl, I had girly things, but also lots of boy stuff, like catapults, games and activities. My mother made sure I mixed with both sexes and that I was allowed to get to know and make friends with lots of people.

    I don't think only children are deprived by not having siblings. I think its if you chose to make them so and either overcompensate or try and justify it to yourselves. If you are happy with only one, then :) If you decide a second would be good, also :)

    Erm end ramble :oops:
     
  15. Kylie1007

    Kylie1007 Well-Known Member

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    As a child I would have quite happily enjoyed being an only child as my younger bro was a brat :twisted: but now we get along very well so I'm glad i'm not an only child!

    I'd def love to give Finn a baby bro or sis in the future (3 yrs or so - birth is still a bit too close at the mo!!!)
     
  16. NickyB

    NickyB Well-Known Member

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    I'm an only child. I don't think I missed out as such, maybe you don't miss what you don't have. I think I'm perfectly well adjusted and don't mind that I was.

    I want more than one, but I know that if I could only have one I wouldn't exactly be upset about it.
     
  17. Foxxi

    Foxxi Well-Known Member

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    Im not an only child.

    However my niece who is now 17 is an only child...and she grew up very very lonely...all she said hat she ever wanted was a brother or a sister...I have felt soooo sorry for her over the years!

    I am the youngest of 3...I always said before I had Fynn...that I would either have no kids or 2.... I personally would never ever have an only child... only because I seen my niece grow up lonely!
     
  18. sarah113

    sarah113 Well-Known Member

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    I have 2 brothers, 1 older and 1 younger
     
  19. trixipaws

    trixipaws Well-Known Member

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    im not an only child, i loved my little sister to bits growing up then when i was 12 found out we had an older sister i was thrilled! i love them both but coz i grew up with the younger one we always had a very close relationship, like best friends (until i met my boyf and moved out :oops: but we still get on)
     
  20. paradysso

    paradysso Well-Known Member

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    im an only child but i enjoyed it, but i did go to boarding school from the age of 7 until 18 so i was living with my friends most the time and only saw my parents 3 times a year. and loved the freedom at school

    now im older im also loving being the only child has my parents have really helped me out and helped me buy a house when i was 18, if i had siblings i dont think they would have done that.

    but saying that i want lots of kids as i love having lots of people around, i think from my time at school, i love it being hectic.
     

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