any new mums to be but who's OH is already a dad?

[LittleL]

Hi all.

I just wondered if there were anyone who's pregnant with there first baby but who's partner already has kids from a previous relationship?

If so, how are you finding it?

This is my first baby but my boyfriend already has two little boys from a previous marriage... I must be honest and say that its been a very hard week for me and the further along i go, the more im struggling.

Basically because my bf is already a daddy and has already 'been there, done that' twice before, i just don't feel like he is 'in' this with me.
I feel like he has already had his 'special life changing moment' when his first born arrived.. All the scans and appointments and first kicks and hearing babys heartbeat is nothing new to him and its upsetting me so much that it feels like we can't share this precious time together. It almost feels like this special moment is not so special anymore because my bf doesnt seem that involved. I've tried talking to him but he doesnt seem to understand how i feel about this.

I just wish he was more supportive and would be more involved with this as i am. Anyone else in my postion that feels the same?

Laura x

p.s/ another thing that gets me, is that he knows more about labour and birth, pain relief and babies than i do and he can be quite patronising with it, especially when he goes off on one about his ex's labour and pregnancy storys - Grrr, this is MY pregnancy and labour and i really DONT want to hear about how you ex coped with such and such and what she had to have done etc...

 

[Amanda W]

Hey my fella is older than me and he has kids infact he has two young ones a son whos 11 and a daughter who is 9 there from a diffrent relationship he has them every friday night untill saturday 5pm now ive been with him for nearly 3years i love his kids very much and would do anything for them.Now hes been there for me with all the scans and midwife appoiments bless him but what gets me is the baby shopping i would love to do shopping with him instead he dosent wanna because hes been through it all before etc sometimes it does upset me because it makes me feel like he just dosent wanna sorta thing but he does surprise me is a baby bath the other day and just carryed on walking then he shouted me and said do i want if i do he will buy it of course i said yes

I know he cant wait till this little on is here neither can i really.But i just wished he would get more involved for the baby shopping i have a pram ordered did he come with me and view it etc??Nope me and my mum went i showed him the picture etc and he said yeah its nice again i sorta felt let down i wanna show him a cot tomoz and hes going to look at it wether he wants to or not lol.

We have just got our own place at last and lastnight we was at the house i was upstairs explaining how i wanted to do the nursery and again he surprised me by one being intrested and also he explained to me best way to do it etc he said its upto me to do it how ever i wanted to if that make sense.

So yes hun iam in the same boat as you

 

[nadine]

awwww bless you, first off, i think its just a man thing, i already have a little boy and my partner has 3 kiddies ranging from 18 15 and 3

men get a bit blazay about it all, but i think its just men in genral even some times with my little boy the way i do things is very different to the way him or his ex partner did things an some times he can comment a little to much, hes learnt to curb it now tho...................

or the other day he said hmmm my ex never got morning sickness as if i was blaggin it, i just said wohhoppy doo for her then, he just looked at me hahahah

as for your partner done it all b4 dont worrie when you have you baby as im sure you av been told it all comes to you and you end up being a super mummy running the show, an trust he wont question you, as mums know best,

i think any situation you get nervous n feel a bit emotibnal, even tho this is my second i still worrie about havin him there in labour, i had my mum last time and that was fine............n it feels kinda weired knowing hes going to be there, dunno y x