Antenatal notes - do I ask to see them?

Discussion in 'Coping with Miscarriage & Loss' started by Laura_C, Feb 19, 2012.

  1. Laura_C

    Laura_C Well-Known Member

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    Ever since we lost Ethan I have had this internal battle with whether I should request to see my antenatal notes as I know there were some issues during my pregnancy, which I just need answers for. In particular the day I went to Triage, I was assessed and put on a trace monitor, told all looked fine and they discharged me. The next day we found out our son was dying and had about 48 hours left. I had an emergency c section the following day at another hospital. I was refused certain diagnostic tests due to it being a weekend and they didn't have the staff. My treatment was poor before the scan revealed my fears were correct, I was treated like I was being silly and an complete inconvenience. I know the MW who spoke to me on the phone at Traige felt like utter shit after she heard I was losing my baby. She actually had an awful attitude, then tried creeping to me once she realised her job may be at stake for her awful treatment of me. I was transferred to a hospital that simply couldn't cope or have the expertise to deal with my son, because everywhere else was full. I felt like me and my child were not a priority and as a result he died 2 days after birth. Tbh the hospital where he was born did their absolute best with what they had but it doesn't help me feel like if he had the care he deserved he could be here today :(

    I was in hospital exactly a year after his death as I had retained products after having my last baby and I got very emotional. I cried all this out to a MW there who was lovely and she encouraged me to go for it. She said it was the only way I would get the answers I needed but I just can't seem to make the first move. I already have a relationship with the consultant MW who heads the maternity services at the hosp but I'm scared :/ so scared of going through it all again but if I don't I'm sure I'll always wonder. I was strong enough until now, I got pregnant only 2 1/2 months after losing Ethan and it was all very difficult and emotional but I have a beautiful, healthy baby girl who we adore and are so blessed to have her. Now she is here and all is well I feel now is probably the right time. It's been over a year though.

    Not sure why I have posted this really, do you think it's worthwhile me doing? I'm so frightened but I'm sure it's something I need to do. How would you approach it? Do I tell them from the off I suspect negligence or leave it until I've seen the notes? I want to get a copy of the trace to get another medical opinion too. What would you do??

    TIA xxxx
     
    #1 Laura_C, Feb 19, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2012
  2. cosmicgirl

    cosmicgirl Well-Known Member

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    I requested my notes after the hideous mismanagement of my delivery. I just wanted to know what went on, I couldn't remember that day in the detail I needed to be able to accept it iykwim.
    What I read was harrowing and very upsetting but I needed to see them.
    You don't have to disclose why you are requesting your notes, I didn't.
    Maybe request them, you don't have to read them straight away, read when/if you feel ready.
    So sorry for your loss hunnie :hugs: xx
     
  3. Mrs N

    Mrs N Well-Known Member

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    Im thinking of requesting mine after my birth as it was a catalogue of errors but the midwife tried to put us off doing it saying that it was hard to get them back and we would have to pay!?! Still think we will persue it to resolve a few questions, might be worth doing the same so you can try and come to terms with what happened to you.
    xxxx
     
  4. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to hear about your horrific ordeal hun,

    I would maybe think about requesting the info - that way you set the wheels in motion. You don't have to actually read them unless you feel up to it?

    Sorry I can't be more use, but if it were me I'd def need to know

    xxxxxxxxxxx
     
  5. JJ Mum

    JJ Mum Well-Known Member

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    Hi Laura, yes I would request a copy of them, like you said you will always have what if's unless you see them, it still may not answer all your questions, but can only help to have all the info documented when it's right for you XX
     
  6. Laura_C

    Laura_C Well-Known Member

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    Thanks girls :)

    Apparently I would have to go through them with a MW so I wouldn't necessarily just get a copy, I think from the sounds of it I would have to make an appt to go through it with them - which I think is what's putting me off. I've decided I'm gonna go for it this week when I get a minute and arrange it all x
     
  7. Sali2012

    Sali2012 Well-Known Member

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    Hi Laura, just wanted to say that you have all the right to see your medical notes.. Whether or not it would help you grieve for the loss baby would really depend on what happened. I know I would definitely would want to know everything purely because then you know that you have done everything in your power! As far as making an appt to go through it with them is probably the right way because then they can explain if there's anything you don't understand or misread! I would also ask for a copy so can get second opionion! I'm so very sorry for your loss! xx
     
  8. tambo1976

    tambo1976 Well-Known Member

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    I would definately ask to see your notes, they are your notes and you have every right to read them. If you do have to go through your midwife I would definately take your OH or a good friend as it will be an upsetting read.

    Lots of love and so sorry for your loss xxx
     
  9. lizsamuel80

    lizsamuel80 Well-Known Member

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    My Doctor has given me all my notes for my miscarriages when I've had them just in case there are problems after and he's not around. He also told me not to go to any ER just to go to King Edward which is specifically for women and babies.

    I don't see it being a problem to ask them at all.
     
  10. Maria1977

    Maria1977 Well-Known Member

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    At my hospital you can either pay to go look at your notes, pay a larger amount for a copy of part of the notes, more for the entire notes or see a consultant and go through it with them. You can't see your notes but they have them there and answer all questions you have. xxx
     

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