Anniversary of miscarriage

Discussion in 'Coping with Miscarriage & Loss' started by Little Miss Joslyn, Mar 30, 2006.

  1. Little Miss Joslyn

    Little Miss Joslyn Well-Known Member

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    Hi,
    Hope you dont mind but I dont know who to talk to as nobodyreally understands unless they have experienced it like yourselves. It is the anniversary of my miscarriage 30th March. i know this sounds morbid but a year on today, I realise I still havent got over this and was hoping I would be pregnant again so it wouldnt be so painful. The worst of it was, one of the girls I work with has just told the girls she is 3 months pregnant but who was the last one to find out? Me! :shock: Nobody told me as they didnt want to upset me but know I feel even worse as I have been trying and hers was an accident! :oops: I was leaving work tonight and all the girls were fussing over her and then one of them turned round and said " Did you know Sarah pregnant!" :talkhand: Any other day i would have been ok with it but to hear this today made me go home and cry! I have bot thursday off so I am going for a facial and chinese lunch with my OH to try to cheer myself up but deep down im hurting inside! Sorry to bend your ear but I just wanted to express my feelings.
    Nichola X :cry: :x :oops: :shock: :evil: :wink: :)
     
  2. lauramumof2

    lauramumof2 Well-Known Member

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    Its definately best to express your feelings especially at a time like this. Anniversarys of painfull memories are horrible and the first is the worst.
    Its a shame about the girl at work, you would want to be happy but there is that wee bit inside that wont let you and most people will understand that.
    I dont think you should expect to get over your loss but you hopefully will learn to live and cope with it and hopefully it will start to hurt less.

    Im glad that you are doing something nice, a facial and a chinese sounds lovely.

    Take care
    Laura
    xx
     
  3. rach

    rach Well-Known Member

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    im sorry for your loss hun big hugs xxxxxxx
     
  4. bagpuss

    bagpuss Well-Known Member

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    You shouldn't have to keep it in puff puff with all the support that the girls on this forum can offer you - and if bending everyones ear here makes you feel better,then you should do it as much as you need,and not feel daft. Like Laura said,you may never get over your loss,but talking about it may help ease the pain,even if it's only a small amount.
    Enjoy Thursday!

    Bagpuss xx
     
  5. Wobbles

    Wobbles Well-Known Member

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    ((Hugs))

    I think this time next year I'm going to be thinking back on my experience too. I'd assume most do.

    People do try & protect your feelings but we all do it & sometimes its an automatic reaction rather than thinking about it first.

    I know what you mean by the 'accident' thing too - I've thought about this after stumbling onto a website I got a HORRID shock to find pictures of aborted babies. I was ill!! But that night I also felt angered by these women & it too dawned on me what I'm going through is cruel when a lot of women out there don't want there babies, have babies for the wrong reasons & even go to drastic measures of aborting a life.

    You know where my PM box is Puff puff if you fancy a chat again :D
     
  6. Little Miss Joslyn

    Little Miss Joslyn Well-Known Member

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    Thanks girls, My mum says i should speak to someone from the miscarriage association but I find it just as comforting on this forum. mailing you girls. I only wish I had known about it this time last year when I felt alone and empty. After thinking I was pregnant last month and getting a positive test but then getting my period, has really confused me as I dont know if it was another miscarriage but I didnt have the same terrible pains as last time but slight cramps. i know you can still have periods and be pregnant as you experianced Bagpus but I think that is wishful thinking with me as I dont seem to have much luck in my life! :(
    I just feel fed up and fat at the moment and being pregnant would be a great excuse for being fat but the difference is I would be over the moon instead of fed up! I feel like im cracking up and cant stop thinking about everything going on. Maybe I need a hypnotist :wall:
    Nichola x
     
  7. lauramumof2

    lauramumof2 Well-Known Member

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    honey, maybe it would be good to see someone proffesional about your miscarriage. This forum is great but you sound like you need that something extra to help you though. You need to maybe address these feelings before you get pg.
    Hope your day off went well, how was the meal
     
  8. Little Miss Joslyn

    Little Miss Joslyn Well-Known Member

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    My doctor refered me to see a councilor after my miscarriage who I do see once a month but it doesnt really help me much! The meal was nice thanks although i had to pay as my boyfriend isnt working at the moment as he left his job this time last year to go self employed fitting conservatory blinds.This didnt really take off and I think he was blind going into it! I hope he will find something soon as it is a worry with trying for a baby! Im 30 and have been with him for 12 years so if we dont try now, we never will! I dont think there is ever a right time to have kids, do you?
    Nic x
     
  9. lauramumof2

    lauramumof2 Well-Known Member

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    Hi Nic,
    Your right, its never the right time to have them. We though at first we will wait till we have done this and done that but then we decided it was just time to go for it which was good as it took a wee while. We thought with number 2 that we shouldnt wait too long in case we had problems again and it happened pretty quick. Its never really in your own hands I dont think.

    Im glad you had a nice meal, you deserve it.
     
  10. Wobbles

    Wobbles Well-Known Member

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    Hope your feeling much more positive this week puff puff, been thinking of you.

    x
     
  11. Jaidy

    Jaidy Well-Known Member

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    Hi Puff Puff,

    Just read your posts and I know how you feel.I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I have not had the tragedy of experiencing a miscarriage but I am in the same ship that I want to pregnant, and that it would make me so happy. All the girls on here must be reading my posts and thinking 'not her again going on about wanting to be pregnant!'

    How long have you been trying for? What u say about it being the right time to have kids is true, if everyone left it to the 'perfect' time to have their babies they would never have them!!! There is never a 'right' time you just have to go with whats best for you. Im only 20 and people say im too young but its personal choice.

    Im always here for you to chat to about getting preg!!! Ur still trying I take it???
     
  12. Little Miss Joslyn

    Little Miss Joslyn Well-Known Member

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    Hi Jaidybaby,
    Welcome to the forum and baby dust to you. I have been trying for nine months on and off as only when I feel like it! :lol: I dont think you are too young as my sister had her baby at 17 ! Although she is not with the father anymore, but my little niece is 7 now and was Gods gift as she has bought so much happiness into everyones life. :angel: I have been with my OH for 12 years and have wanted a baby for the last five but he wasnt ready to be a Dad so I respected that at the time but now we wish we had done it years ago. You cant change the past but you can the future! They say its easier to have kids younger now but a lot of people are leaving it to their 30s like me! Its strange though as I only look 22 but my biological clock is ticking!
    Hi Wobbles, Thanks for thinking of me. thats really sweet :angel: I have been feeling really irrritable lately and nearly told a customer to **** off today. Dont know if its because I had the miscarriage around this time last year, PMT or just because im a stressy cow! Im due on 10th April so must be PMT! :doh: HOpe you are keeping your chin up and it hasnt caused too much stress on your relationship.
    Luv Nic x
     
  13. Jaidy

    Jaidy Well-Known Member

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    Hi Puff Puff,

    Just wondered how you were and how you were feeling. Its nice to know your opinion on me TTC, seems babies bring happiness all round but they seem so hard to get lol. I hope your feeling better and not quite so irritable now, it will be me in a few weeks no doubt xxx
     
  14. Wobbles

    Wobbles Well-Known Member

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    :lol:

    Done it myself in polite terms of course :shhh:
     
  15. Little Miss Joslyn

    Little Miss Joslyn Well-Known Member

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    Hiya,
    Im still feeling like I want to explode. Think its because my pweriod is about to explode in me!
    Nic x :x :x :x :x :x
     
  16. Little Miss Joslyn

    Little Miss Joslyn Well-Known Member

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    OMG, just read my thread and nothing has changed and im back to square 1 and feeling exactly the same. :shock: i havent been on here for some time as i am now having infertility tests and waiting for IUI.
    Congratulations Jaidy on your beautiful baby boy im so pleased for you. :cheer
    Hi there Rach, glad to see you are doing well and not long to go now hun. Well, It is coming up to the 2nd anniversary of my miscarriage and guess what? im still not pregnant and OH still has no work :roll: My sister is about to give birth and im feeling pissed off and getting impatient again. Nothing changes x
     
  17. Happybunny

    Happybunny Well-Known Member

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    Hi Honey

    I was a little confused when I first saw the date of this thread. I just wanted to send some hugs your way. The effects of miscarriage can dull over time, but it is never forgotten. I really hope something wonderful happens for you, you have been waiting a long time. :hug: :hug: :hug:
    Love
    Michelle
    x
     
  18. happy-chick

    happy-chick Well-Known Member

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    Hey Little Miss Joslyn,

    Ive not met you before but wanted to say sorry your having a tough time, keep your chin up hun.

    Take Care xxx
     
  19. fothers

    fothers Well-Known Member

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    Hi LMJ, sorry you are still feeling rough.

    I hope things settle down for you soon :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  20. valentine

    valentine Well-Known Member

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    Hi honey,

    I am praying that things turn round for you soon.

    Valentine xxx
     

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