An optimistic take on the tww and a BFN!

BettyHoop

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Hi all.

I wanted to pass my thoughts on about the tww I had the other day.

When we are young and naive, we long to be older, to have the responsibilities grown ups have, to marry and have families. We long to look mature, and wish each birthday comes around quicker...until....

Now we are older we long to look younger, to have a day where we can ditch our responsibilities and take some time out. We start to wish time would slow down and ageing doesn't come on too rapidly. We start to hear our body clocks ticking and wish to slow time down.

When ttc and especially in the tww, times seems to slow down, each day an agonising wait.

So wouldn't it be nice to view the tww as a time of extended opportunity, the gift of extra time in a world where old age seems to close in far too quickly.

The greatest gift in life is time.

If only I had thought of this sooner...and if only my emotional mind would take my logical minds advice!

I cracked and took a pt today. BFN! I felt inconsolable all morning but now wonder why on earth I've been moping around for weeks. Because I forgot that time is precious.

It's just become the norm now, this feeling of despair at not having the family I dreamt of what feels like a lifetime ago.

I in no way mean to offend, I don't begrudge anyone their despair, I've had so long feeling like this it almost feels like I can't change it.

But logically, I can, and logically, I'm off to the pub!
 
Perception of time is so strance, the 2WW drags on forever but the OV period is gone in the blink of an eye or at least thats how it feels for me. I never wished to be older, but I always had such clear focus that I would get married and have a baby, I only ever wanted one. It seems quite sad that we are struggling with the latter now.

Slow down time, before I know it I fear I may be too old to ever conceive. While I wait for that to happen I am becoming more positive and fingers crossed the day will arrive xx
 

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