Am I going crazy?

Apple2018

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I had a baby girl via c section at 32 + 6 due to placental abruption. She is now starting to feed at 2 weeks old and is still in the special nursery. I have been advised that there is no concerns at present but she required oxygen at birth and was floppy but only stayed on oxygen for 6 hours and was on air for 2 days.
I spoke with a doctor who advised me her acid levels in her blood were fine and that she is unlikely to have issues in the future but i just had to ask the doctor more questions today regarding my placental abruption at 33 weeks but wish I never! I was advised my baby gasped for air when she came out via emergency c section so asked the doc if that was normal. She advised my baby came out floppy too but was given oxygen and was soon breathing as you would expect and that they think she came out in time. Her apgar scores were 4, 8 and 8. She was only on oxygen for 6 hours and just air for 2 days.
I am becoming obsessed by this and I am so worried incase she has developmental problems. The doc thinks the risks were minimised but obviously can't guarantee it. I am not sure if this is part of my post natal depression / anxiety but i am getting really upset by this and scared incase she has issues or if she is brain damaged - i know ott thinking there!
Had a referral to the obstitrician so will discuss the birth then but not sure i want to now. She is progressing well and now taking her bottle feeds so no indicators or concerns with her.
Am I going crazy??? The way i see it i should be enjoying her and thinking we will face any challenges together as a family but i can't let this go. I am getting mental health support at the moment too and a referral to the perinatal mental health team. But as mentioned, am i crazy or is this normal???? We are still in the special nursery so maybe too much time on my hands??
 
Hi!
Congratulations on your baby girl, it must of been so scary delivering her that way but she is here which is the main thing.
My baby is 13 weeks old and I have had terrible anxiety up until this point. I was worried about everything and would cry every night so I can’t imagine how you feel. I would say that yes, your worrying is probably part of being a new mum and it will hopefully settle down. However given your birth it’s totally natural for you to worry more than others.The only thing you can do is take it day by day and watch your baby girl progress.. she’s feeding and breathing on her own which is amazing!! Like the doc said they most likely minimised the risks to her so try to be positive. If it helps I also felt like I should be enjoying my baby more when he was a few weeks old but I’ve only really started enjoying being a mum now so don’t beat yourself up. Your doing your best and that’s the main thing xxx
 
Hi Apple,

congrats on becoming a mummy! And I’m sorry to hear the conditions of your birth.
I completely understand your concerns, but with pre-term births it’s is a case of wait and see I’m afraid. If it’s any comfort I’ve had friends with babies born at 32 and 25 weeks and they are all developing perfectly. good luck, I hope everything is ok! X
 

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