3 week old baby and I'm all over the place what's happening to me

[iwanttobeamumm]

First of all I have two daughters 3 years old and 3 weeks old my OH is in the army so is away Sunday evening until Friday evening the rest of the time I'm on my own with the girls, the first thing that's bothering me is how much I miss sex, my sex drive is insane at the minute my stitches feel healed and aren't sore at all anymore but I'm still bleeding so haven't had sex my OH is scared of hurting me, also I feel like I want to be pregnant again which is really bizarre because I had awful pregnancies with both girls and I'm just feeling normalish again, I'm really down because I miss my OH so much and I'm not eating properly (or at all really unless I feel faint I had a vegi risotto on Monday and I've just eaten a burger now (Wednesday) and just had snacks inbetween) I have a history of eating disorders and feel like it's creeping back but honestly I feel like I don't want to get help or get better yet because I'm so fat from having my youngest and thankfully nobody is around to notice me not eating so its not really an issue at the minute and also I'm absolutely exhausted as the girls are taking it in turns to get me up through the night 😴 I just feel... Very floopy and all over the place and so unorganised

 

[Maud]

It sounds like you are doing an amazing job looking after your two girls mostly on your own. But you must look after yourself too.. At 3 weeks pp you mustn't worry about body shape. Hard I know, but it will take time to get back to normal. Could you prepare some meals at the weekend so that you just need to reheat them rather than find the energy to prepare a meal from scratch each night? Could you eat with your 3 year old? Do you have any friends you could chat to or have lunch dates with? Do you have a support network from your eating disorder? Don't be afraid to talk to your HV and ask for help, whether it's just someone to talk to or help with your eating.

 

[JD.Deedee]

You're going to be seriously ill if you carry on almost starving yourself! You need food for energy, you will healthily lose your baby weight if you actually eat. Not eating enough is going to make you exhausted, it's going to make you I'll, you get a chance of falling into a vicious circle where you will feel nauseous! I have first hand experience with this and all it did is make me feel worse and worse and I just can't force myself to eat anymore and that was mainly because I was eating too much crap when I did eat.

I've started making a breakfast smoothie every morning and after three years I'm finally starting to lose my mum tum and I feel much better tho when I feel sickly I very easily get dragged back into that circle of not eating enough...

Stay away from diet products, lights, low fats and no fat as these have more sugar and or artificial sweeteners in that make you crave stuff and more likely sweeter stuff.

Too many sugars especially unhealthy ones convert into the fat you don't want, normal occurring fat and protein will keep you nourished and the protein will help build muscle. You still need some bits of sugar for energy. Try to eat whole foods instead of whites, this is better for your bloodsugar which is likely to do with why you feel faint.

 

[KateK]

This sounds so, so unhealthy. Bless you, you must be having a horrific time but PLEASE put your sensible hat on and don't let your eating disorder take grip for your sake and your girls. I had anorexia as a teenager and it was the most miserable, dark, distressing 5 years of my life. Please just try and focus on all the negative aspects of disordered eating (i'm not sure how severely you've suffered in the past..) but remember all the miserable times. Also, and I used to hate hearing this but knew it was true, food is our fuel and we cannot function mentally or physically without it. It is not the enemy and restrcting your food will not make you lise weight healthily in the long term. Please, message me if you need someone to talk to or even better find the inner strength to go and see a professional. Sending you so much love, please don't do this to yourself. Your daughters need a strong Mummy to guide them through xxx