20 weeks scan gender

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Chat' started by pmitch1979, Apr 26, 2016.

  1. pmitch1979

    pmitch1979 New Member

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    Hi All,
    I'm new on here and just wanted a little advice and piece of mind really...
    We had our 20 wks scan yesterday and I was desperate to find out what we were having, although I had a feeling it was a boy and was still so disappointed when they confirmed that this was :( I feel so bad about my reaction, I know I will love my baby but I was secretly hoping it was a little girl (I am from a family of girls and a female heavy workplace). My usband has been amazing and so supportive, but I just want it to be a happy time for him too. Also, all our friends have just had baby girls, which is really playing on my mind even more :(
    Anyone else feel the same? xx
     
  2. naomi88

    naomi88 Well-Known Member

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    I am staying team yellow but I think feelings like that are totally natural. My friend went through something similar but I know that the moment she met her little boy any disappointment she had previously felt went out the window. Will you have another child in the future? You may have a little girl at some point. The little boys I know are lovely though and boys are often more cuddly than girls so I am sure you will love being a mum to a little boy.

    Feelings of disappointment though are nothing to feel guilty about. Xxx
     
  3. Jojo84

    Jojo84 Well-Known Member

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    I cant really relate to this I'm afraid... I didn't care what I had as long as baby was healthy.
    have you stooped to consider that you may not actually be "disappointed" but maybe scared because you feel like you don't know what to do with a boy? if youre used to girls then maybe you feel like it will be unknown.
     
  4. Glordag

    Glordag Well-Known Member

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    We found out with all three of ours. I wanted the second to be another boy and felt disappointed and guilty. It took me a couple of weeks to get over it.
    I can totally relate to your disappointment and you shouldn't feel bad. The moment you hold him in your arms it won't matter a bit x
     
  5. Lil miss lee

    Lil miss lee Well-Known Member

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    I can relate to this so badly lol. I just found out we are having another boy. This is my 4th baby but only the 2nd with my new partner I have 2 boys and 1 girl was really hoping for a girl so my daughter got the sister she's always wanted and daddy got his little princess. Unfortunately that didn't happen. But I will still love this baby the same as I would if it was a girl.
     
  6. YorksLass

    YorksLass Well-Known Member

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    I'm sure when you meet him you'll be head over heels in love...
    We're staying team yellow, and although I always say I don't mind so long as it's happy and healthy, I do secretly side on wanting a girl. I feel deep down that it might well be a girl, so I'll likely be very surprised if a boy pops out! But really, I think when we hold them in our arms, it doesn't matter - they're our babies :)
     
  7. Smileygirl

    Smileygirl Well-Known Member

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    I have one little boy and to me, he is just perfect. This time, I would love a little girl as I feel I already have one perfect little boy - probably strange logic of mine and I don't know if anyone really gets what I am trying to say. I guess I am a little bit scared on the effect another baby will have on my little boy in general as he has unrivalled attention from both mummy and daddy at the moment and maybe a girl would mean fewer comparisons between them than having two boys? But whether it's a boy or a girl this time, I will love them both the same :)
     
    #7 Smileygirl, Apr 27, 2016
    Last edited: Apr 27, 2016
  8. RoisinC

    RoisinC Well-Known Member

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    I can relate to this, I was very upset when I found out this baby will be our 3rd boy - we have one daughter and I really struggled for a while. I know I'll love him the same so that was never an issue, i love my boys to bits- but I felt so strongly about having another daughter for loads of reasons. I think you need to process how you feel and deal with your feelings in your own way and own time. And don't let anyone make you feel guilty about how you feel- they just don't understand. Just cos we are mummys doesn't mean we're not human with feelings and preferences - and having a preference doesn't mean we won't love our baby boys/girls the same. What helped me was knowing and reminding myself that this little boy needs me more than I need a baby girl, if that makes sense xx
     
  9. SiameseCatLady

    SiameseCatLady Well-Known Member

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    I can sort of get what you're saying, but if he's healthy, that is all tha matters. He will bring you great joy and happiness and you'll love him so much, you'll forget these feelings.
    They aren't something to feel guilty about, but health is surely priority :) He's going to be perfect, I am sure. Xxx
     
  10. mummywanabe

    mummywanabe Well-Known Member

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    I always thought I'd want a daughter, we didn't find out what we were having and were over the moon to have our son, this time I thought I'd want a girl but after having my little man I'd be more than happy with another boy, there are no guarantees in life but I can probably guarantee the minute you hold him and know he's ok you won't care
     

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