16 weeks pregnant my partner left me :(

[Rhea]

Hello everyone,
Am 22 and 16 weeks pregnant wi my first av had a really rough pregnancy so far av been really sick since week 4 with hyperemesis and suffering with depression quite bad, I was wi my partner for 3 years we had a home together and I did n still do love him very much,

He basically left me a few weeks back because he doesn't want to be a dad agen (he already has kids) since then he has been so cruel saying I am not mentally stable to be a mum, he never wants anythin to do wi me or the baby and keeps saying go and get rid of it, he is really making me feel so worthless am extremely hurt and alone and all I do is cry and feel pathetic he's making me think am not goin to be good enough for my baby but I know I will luv her :am Havin a girl)

Basically av lost everythn since bein pregnant av lost my partner, my home, my job as av been to sick to work, my social life as am bed bound most of the time with this horrid hyperemesis or in hospital, and now am just so depressed n I feel so guilty on my baby, am going to Speke to the mental health team Tuesday at the woman's hospital about my depression,

Has anyone else been in a similiar sito wer ther partner left and how did you manage to cope? Any responses would be highly appreciated, hope everyone is well xx

 

[Leeslocket]

I am so sorry to read that he has done this to you (men can be such cowards) all I can tell you is the moment you hold that little girl in your arms nothing else will matter, I've just had my first baby and I can promise you it is the best thing in the whole world. You and her will be best friends from the start and you will focus on giving her everything she needs. My best friend is a single mum and she is so so so happy. I know it's hard an upsetting now but I promise that little baby will make you so happy

 

[millielaura]

When I was 18 I was in the same situation as you. My partner at the time left me as he didn't feel ready to be a father and was threatening me all the time. Sounds like he said the same sorts of things- about being not mentally stable enough and that he didn't want it. I was so sick all the time and had no social life and couldn't work. Once I'd got over him leaving and got all excited it seemed all worth it. So I know what its like feeling so alone etc. I can't give advice about being a single parent as I ended up loosing the baby at 14 weeks. But I can guarentee once your baby girls here it will all be worth it

Don't listen to him if he is going to act so disrespectful towards you and your baby. If he was anything like my ex he id a coward and will say anything to try and get his way. At the end of the day your the one carrying your baby girl and she's loved and wanted by you and thats what matters

 

[MrsHttc]

Hi Rhea.
I really feel for you after reading your thread.
My partner left me when I was pregnant with our 3rd child, my little boy, when I was 26 weeks or so. At that time I also had an 11month old and 22 month old girls.
Men really are total cowards, but we women are made of strong stuff. I totally understand how your feeling, what helped me was my unborn baby...I was so determined to show him that he wasn't needed or wanted and that I could look after my kids without his input, which I did. My children are now 7,8 & 9, and very happy, and I'm pregnant with mine and my husbands first. There really is light at the end of the tunnel honey. It's easier said than done right now, but be strong for your baby and he/she will get you through this xxx

 

[bbee]

hey. my boyfriend was like this, he left me and tried to force me into abortion multiple times! he also played the whole 'mentally unstable' card with me as i had severe depression. three years is a long time, im sure he will come round, My OH did and he was an arsehole! once he realises that this is going to happen and you are going to have this baby no matter what he says or does, im sure he will come crawling back. chin up x x x

 

[Rhea]

Aw thank you so much for the responses! I am trying to stay positive it's so hard n ecspecially becoz am so sick with this horrid hyperemesis am literally housebound with it so can't really go out to see friends or go so normal things like the pictures or for a meal to take my mind of it all,

It's just unbelievable tha someone who is ment to love u will jst leave you coz your having ther baby! Am 17 weeks pregnant Sunday and he knows av had a hard miserable pregnancy he should know that am having the baby 100% but am sure he thinks if he stays away and just be cruel to me that I will have the abortion, he's 30 years old not some young teenager he should no better! I would rather him just stay away for good tho now, as much as I wish he wud cumn back apologise and says he loves me and wants me and baby I know it's not gona happen so I don't want to be waiting round for him av got my health to think of and my unborn daughter,

Thanks agen for the replys girls xx

 

[jemfox]

have just read your post. i really do feel for you, hyperemesis alone is a life changing struggle, it put a strain on my marriage but thankfully we pulled through.
this man sounds like a dick, but i wouldn't be surprised that when the hyperemesis passes and you feel better in yourself he may come crawling back because he realises what hes missing.
you've put up with hyperemesis, illness, depression, that dick, all on top of a pregnancy. im the same age as you and i don't think i could have done it. just think if you can get through this with your head held high then your a bigger and better person than he ever is.

chin up, because soon your going to have a little girl as proof your guna be ok xx

 

[Rhea]

Aw thank you Hun!
Am glad you and your husband have pulled through! This hyperemesis is horrendous I don't know how we have managed to get this far! You need all the emotional support you can get and I know I would obviously of loved the bbys dad to be here and support me emotionally, but yes he is an absolute dick! I don't think he will come crawling back but only time will tell, he doesn't even deserve me or my baby!

How is your hyperemesis now? Av been so ill with bronchitis so that has just kicked off the sickness! Feel bloody awfull, I hope ur okay xx

 

[jemfox]

no your absolutely right, hes doesn't deserve you!

im ok, had a bad relapse beginning of week, although not being sick as much its the nausea that is just as hard to deal with!
im due back at work Monday with a phased return after 2 months off, ii have occupation health this afternoon also, but annoyed because last time the lady went on about me trying remedies and passed it as normal morning sickness so not looking forward to meeting today!
is bronchitis clearing up for you now?
xx

 

[Rhea]

Aww the nauseau is just as bad as the actual vomiting I hate it! I don't know how we have coped with nauseau everyday for this many weeks!! It's horrendous and so rad to enjoy life at the minute as am still housebound aww I hope your well enough for work! There's no way I could work like this! I had jst started a new job befor I was pregnant and had to leave it,

Av still gor bronchitis ano it's gona take a while to clear up like, hope both our HG just completely vanishes for us soon! How are you with food now? I can only eat bits of certain things still xx

 

[jemfox]

oh bless you, hopefully when the bronchitis clears the hg will get better.
im okayish with food, If I feel nauseous I wont eat because I know it will come back up. , surprisingly im obsessed with coco pops lately, there the only thing that hasn't come up, strange because its milk and before I couldn't touch the stuff!

xx

 

[Jo91]

I'm sorry to hear what has happened, my partner left me 8 weeks before my due date, I am now 6 weeks to go. Do you have lots of support from your family? I try and stay positive and think I am going to have a lovely baby at the end of it, and thinking positive has really helped me also talking to professionals, and also talking to my Mum has helped me a lot too. I hope everything works out for you in the end I'm also 22 as well so you can message me if you like

 

[smith]

Hello. I am going through the same think as you. My partner let me afyet 2 years. Have also byen suffering from hyperemesis. I want to the doctor and they gave me a drug called czcyline. It måde me feel a lot better. My ex boyfriend was said almost the same stuff as yours. He coo wanted me to get an abortion. I know how you feel. I'm ok sometimes but just feel like crying the rest of the time. My boyfriend told me ifølge I had an abortion I wouldn't feel sick. It is so cruel and so heartless . I think we'll start to feel better but prob efter the babies ære børn. I don't think there can be pain that is much worse than this. I'm sorry this is happening to us x

 

[oliviarose]

what a horrible man! hes definitely not worth wasting your tears or thoughts on. if he can see the beauty of having another child with a loving lady then you dont need him, you and your gorgeous baby will manage fine when it arrives hun, have faith!

 

[Goti]

As your story ended, Author? I hope you all is well and you are happy ...

 

[1sttimemum2b]

You are so strong. I have hyperemesis too and my partner is so supportive so the fact you are doing it alone means you are so strong. Honestly I admire you. Your baby will love you for giving her life. Stay strong.